Thursday 31 July 2008

23 weeks 5 days - midwife appointment, hypnobirthing classes, kicks.

Thank you all for your comments on the last entry! Linds, I don't know why it wasn't working for you.. perhaps you don't have Java on your computer? I think that word thing was a Java application. But was quite cool anyhow. Sarah, I know which game you're thinking of when you say Spit, it's not this game, as the game we were playing was turn based and not a "speedy" game as such where everyone was free for all. I don't know if it's an actual game someone has the rules for somewhere, or whether it was sort of made up. But Spit is a fun game also, I played it a lot as a teenager, I used to bring a deck of cards into school and play it with some of my classmates before the lessons started. Got quite rough and ended up with several bent cards! (And I think several scratches on my hands!)

Well anyway it's finally cooler here at least, which is good news. Yesterday was my midwife appointment, I realised a while ago I made it for a week too early, but hey I was only 3 days away from 24 weeks. Blood pressure and urine still absolutely fine. Guessing no leaking proteins etc makes midwives happy bunnies. So far my pregnancy seems to be going very smoothly.

I told her I've been having heartburn lately, and that I've been taking Rennies.. apparently that is a big no-no... Ooops... I'm sure it said Rennies was fine on that website for medication during pregnancy. It also mentions on the packet that it can be used for heartburn during pregnancy... :S Anyhow, she's put a request for a prescription through for Gaviscon, which will be ready for me to pick up in a few hours.

She asked me about Robert's movements too, I told her that he's been kicking every day, and when I got on the table for her to check the heartbeat, he proved it :D Kicked the doppler as she was trying to find it. Hehe! Do all babies do this? It seems that everywhere I've read that babies kick the doppler when the midwife tries to find the heartbeat. :)

Anyway, I sat downstairs, bared my belly, as Robert was kicking, and just sat and watched - I could actually see my belly moving as he kicked. :) I simply cannot imagine not enjoying the kicks right now. I love putting my hands on my bare belly, and feeling the little blips on my hands as well as inside me. I find myself daydreaming about what he'll look like. About the first time I'll get to hold my son. Calling him that makes my eyes well up with tears. It seems stupid, but it feels like I'm the only person in the world who feels this way. But of course I know that's not true! It's a silly way of putting it, and I know how egotistical it sounds. Ah well.

On to other news, J and I are going to our first Hypnobirthing class tonight! Yippee! It happened all rather suddenly, I had the dates written down for a while, and decided we'd better get things sorted out, so I called the practitioner back, and left a message, she called back to say there was still a place available on the course starting this week, and lasting for 5 weeks. So sent credit card details over the phone last night for the deposit, and we bring a cheque for the remaining amount tonight. It is £250 but I think it's well worth it, especially if it works.

I'm glad that Jonathan was happy in the end for us to do it, he was very apprehensive about it all, especially since her website was very uhhh... commercialised. If that's even the word I'm looking for. It was like one of those webpages for the miracle diet things you see advertised, with all the peppy talk and bolded phrases, and the "Buy now and save 10%!!" stuff. That even put me off, but it's the only thing around. And there are plenty of people who do do it. But I am going to give it my all, do the best I can with it. Apparently there will be 5 other couples there, so quite a close-knit class, which is good.

Back onto the subject of Robert, I am occasionally getting some discomfort with my belly. Sometimes it feels like ligament pains, down the sides of my bump almost on my hips, other times it's been actually like it's been IN my belly, like a line through slightly off centre. And the other day I had a pain practically at my pelvis, that low down. None of them too seriously painful, and not recurrent. It might all be ligament pains I guess, but the last one I described almost felt like Robert was laying in a funny place. Not entirely sure anyhow. I am finding it hard to determine Robert's position at any one time. The midwife said yesterday he was still laying sideways, which apparently is normal for babies of this gestation.

Right, well best get off, I need to take a shower, attempt to make my hair look the same as I looked coming out of the hair dresser again, and get ready to go pick up my prescription from town. And maybe stop by Tesco for more milk and maybe some walkers crisps, and also maybe go via the pet store for a new collar for Hazel. Need to think about food for tonight as well - as we won't be eating until we get back from classes unless I make something for the trip down there. We might have a few minutes to grab something to eat before we leave maybe. Hope the weather is cooler for all of you now too!

Monday 28 July 2008

23 weeks 2 days - weekend news and update

Hello all! I hope the weather isn't getting too many people down, I'm just glad I'm not heavily pregnant with this weather! All windows and the french doors open, so luckily a nice breeze ;)

The weekend I had was really good, although the traffic down to Kent was a bit of a pain - a 2 hour journey took us about 3 and a half :( Guess what the culprit was? Yep, you guessed it, the M25. Solid tailbacks where we were joining it. No accident though! Just pure volume of traffic. Anyway, we got there eventually, I met my mum in a salon just a few minutes walk down the road from her house. We were there for a few hours, and I got an absolutely fantastic cut :) I was just about to take a photo of it when the batteries in my camera died, so they're on to charge and I'll take one tomorrow. :)

It was absolutely SWELTERING in my mum's house after, we had a fiddle with the travel system she bought us, mainly getting it out of the box and putting it together. Then once it was fully assembled, we folded it up, took it out and tested to see if it would fit in our small Yaris boot. It did, once the seats were forward a little bit. :) Then we fitted the car seat base, and put the carrier in, with the travel system in the boot, and got me to sit infront of the infant carrier. And yay, we all fit too ;) However! Getting the carrier into the car (3 door Yaris) wasn't fun... J did struggle a bit getting it in and then getting it out again. It would be a lot easier if we had back passenger car doors too. I'm sure we could afford a new car - even if it was a used "new" car, one that had a bigger boot, and one that has 4 passenger doors!

But well, it fit. Anyway, sitting outside, was just SO much more pleasant to sitting inside, where I was getting so uncomfortable it just wasn't funny. So J and I sat outside (actually on the concrete slab in front of their neighbour's house - they live on a typical victorian terraced street, where there's no front gardens, no car parking spaces, etc) while Mum and Dave got ready for the meal. Then went as soon as they were ready.

Had a nice chinese buffet meal. I didn't stuff myself, but they had these GORGEOUS chicken wings, with a salt and spice coating. Mmmm. I had 5 of those! And some other nibbly stuff like ribs, prawn crackers, prawn toast, won tons, chicken skewers. Then also some soup, and then some sweet and sour and some black bean beef. Sounds like loads, but wasn't too much. I even had room for some fruit (water melon! Yum!) and ice cream after ;)

Came back, and Dave went and got their air conditioning unit thing from the dining room (actually used as a study), and set it up in the living room. Sat around, chatted, watched some tv. I felt Robert give a few kicks while I was lounging on their huge sofa, and I told mum I'd let her feel him kick if he would co-operate, so I called her over and she sat with her hand on my belly for AGES, but he'd stopped. Ah well! Anyway, we finally left there around 11pm, to spend the night at my dad's. His spare bedroom is a lot closer to the bathroom, which is a godsend these days ;)

Dad and Caroline were already in bed, so we let ourselves in, and went to bed straight away. It was another hot and sticky night, Caroline had not put the duvet on the sofa-bed (thank god!) instead just leaving the duvet cover on as a sheet. The windows were also open, and there was a fan going in the room as well. Was quite nice to have it blowing on my leg, since it made my whole body feel cooler with my leg cold (for some reason!). Ended up using the toilet twice during the night, well once during the night, and then once at around 8am. I actually had a really vivid dream before I woke up at 8ish. So vivid, even remembering back now it seems real. I dreamed that we were in bed, and as usually happens, Dad or Caroline comes in (argh - a bit of a pain when we sleep in the buff, especially if sheets aren't on fully, etc) to tell us that breakfast is on the go, etc. Anyway, in my dream, Dad came in, and said "Wakey wakey!" I opened my eyes, and looked up at him sleepily and said in a really grumpy voice "NO." And then Jonathan looked up and said the same. So Dad went out, and I started dreaming "again". It was soo real! I was sure it had actually happened! When I woke up a few hours later (or what seemed to be), I turned over and asked Jonathan if he remembered Dad coming in, and he said he didn't! I looked at the time on his phone, and it said 8.14am, and I thought hmm.. there's no way that Dad would have come in around 6am to wake us... it must have been a dream! But I was sooo confused for ages! Hehe.

The day was nice, and actually quite lazy. I was expecting to be slaved away most of the day making salad, preparing bowls of nibbles, etc etc. But we only had a little bit to help with about an hour before people came round. We played a card game during the afternoon - it's a good game, although I don't know its name. Usually played with 2 people, each person with their own pack of cards in play. We decided to see if it would work with 3 players, played with Caroline (she had her own pack then too), and it did work quite well! :) It's a bit like Solitaire, but multiplayer, and you can use other people's decks and so on. The goal of the game is to be the first player to run out of cards in your pack, and discard pile. Cards in front of you are ok as long as you have no cards left to deal. I wish I knew the name of the game, it's very fun.

Anyway, had a nice time when people turned up too, food was good, and chatted away, in particular to Maria, the mother of Caroline's nieces and nephew, who was interested in my pregnancy, and so on. What I didn't know, was that the twins were born 7 weeks early! Wow... And also, her son was born 5 weeks early. Heh, and I got a comment from Caroline's dad "I wasn't expecting you to look so thin" HAHAHA! I did almost laugh out loud, I'm hardly what you can call "thin" but I guess what he meant was my tummy. And it's true, my bump ISN'T very big for someone over halfway through, but that's because it's masked by fat! ;) However, my bump to me does seem to be getting bigger. And I think my skin agrees. I AM getting quite attrocious stretch marks. I did have a few nice purple ones from my weight gain pre-pregnancy, but now I have lots and lots of not so purple ones on my bump below my belly button. Ah well! I do try and use my moisturising oil on my bump whenever it gets itchy.

It was also nice to see the kids again - the twins, Samantha and Jennifer, were 12 in January. And their brother, Timothy, was 11 in May. I remembered to send the twins cards (I hand-made them), but couldn't find my check-book nor had any cash at the time, so sent them an "IOU" for �12. Also, I completely forgot Tim's birthday. So before coming down, I made sure to have �12 each for the girls, and �11 for Tim, and got some little cards and wrote in them, apologising for forgetting, and here's their birthday money, etc. I will probably stop sending them money when they get to the age of either 18 or 21, so they all get the same amount so to speak. My flub got a pat by Caroline's mum (*sigh*) so I made sure to point out that at the moment, Robert isn't up there, but actually just down below my belly button at the moment ;) We headed back home around 8.30pm, and got home around 10.30, which was a much better journey than the one down on Saturday morning/afternoon!

As I laid down to sleep, Robert woke up, and he seemed to kick for ages, but he didn't really keep me awake with it. His kicks are still quite gentle. :)

Anyway, busy day today, got some phoning around to do, and so on (sorting out hypnobirthing classes hopefully, and finding a new Vet for Hazel). Hope you're all ok and surviving this horrid humid heat! ;) xx

Thursday 24 July 2008

22 weeks 5 days - strong kicks, things to sort, and a nice TMI night last night ;)

It's only been a week, but I feel like this little boy has grown SO much! I can now feel his kicks when I put my hands on my tummy! Not all the time mind you, but still, it's pretty clear when Robert is kicking, it feels much stronger already! It is still the most wonderful feeling in the world, I just love it so much! I hope I never grow to resent those little kicks he gives me, even if it hurts or if he keeps me up at night with them.

Sometimes I feel like the enormity of what J and I are about to experience in having a baby hasn't quite kicked in. I mean, it has, but we still have so much to do, namely... that damned spare bedroom that's still piled up with boxes!!! We haven't touched it in months! And then there's sorting out lists of things we need to get, things we need to do. I guess we still have a lot of time - 4 months until my due date, but we must be prepared for the possibility that he will come sooner.

I still have the nappies to sort out, the hypnobirthing classes, hospital bag, all sorts! Prioritising even now should be a major concern to me, but all I can seem to think about is how tired I am most of the time. I estimate that I sleep for about 12 hours a day lately. I go to bed at midnight usually, wake up at 9am when Jonathan goes to work, and then usually have a nap in the middle of the day for a few hours. I just seem so lazy, because even when I get up, the 12 hours I am awake, I don't seem to feel like doing a lot. *sigh*

This next paragraph has a bit of TMI
Ah well. Something else of note is that last night, for probably the first time in MONTHS (I can't remember when the last time was, before last night), J and I you knowed ;) I seem to keep having a lot of sexy dreams, more so than baby dreams. But anyway, J is a very sexual person, and I know he has been extremely worried about hurting the baby, or just has a problem with the "weirdness" factor. I keep telling him that there are plenty of men with the same worries, and that he should research it to give himself some piece of mind, but he doesn't. Anyway, I figured I'd give him a treat, but of course it ended up you know where, and even I was surprised at how good it felt for me, and pretty sure after several months it probably felt damned good for him too. Was nice though, to do that. And J was still very gentle (worried about hurting Robert, squashing him or whatever). And I know unless you're told not to, there's no reason why you shouldn't.
End of TMI

Right, well today I need to go into town, and do the things I mentioned yesterday. And get some more milk and fruit, and maybe some nibbly things for me ;) We had pizza last night, got a normal tesco value margerita, and added extra toppings to it, including some extra sauce, cheese, pepper, onion and bacon. It was nice! We decided to use up a tin of baked beans I'd had a couple days ago on it for the base, that was being kept in the fridge, and that was nice too! I think the pizza could have used more bacon though ;) I do like my bacon. My vice is most definitely food. (Hense the size 18-20) Hehe.

I hope today will be a nice active day for Robert. I had 2 or 3 strong kicks from him before I got up this morning, which was nice :) I do enjoy feeling him in there. Hope you're all well, girls. xx Thanks for reading.

Wednesday 23 July 2008

22 weeks 4 days - lack of energy, kicks, birthdays

Hello! Back again. I am finding myself increasingly tired again, and wondering if it's because Robert might be going through another growth phase? My energy just seems really sapped - I'm needing loads of sleep lately. Yesterday I slept in til 11am, and felt good for several hours, but then needed a nap around 7pm, just feeling completely drained. Also, last night, I felt SO completely bloated, I guess our meal was quite large, but still, it felt quite foreign to me. It felt to me like my tummy was HUGE, but then I looked down, and it was still the same size as yesterday! What was up with that?! ;) I climbed into bed groaning, and managed a fitful sleep.

Robert is still kicking away merrily in there. :) I laid down on the bed a few times during the day, and put my hands on my tummy - I think this encourages him to kick, he must feel the heat of my hands. I got several kicks that I think were strong enough to feel from the outside! I say think, I'm sure you girls have the same, that because you can feel it so plainly from the INSIDE, sometimes it's hard to distinguish what you feel inside and what (if anything) you feel outside! At least in this stage when the kicks are still quite gentle.

I've been using the maternity pillow J got me for my birthday the last couple of nights - it is extremely comfortable! Even now, without a huge bump! The only problem comes when I need to flip over onto my other side, I need to re-arrange the pillow too.

Anyway, I'll leave it there for now. I need to head into town today, it's my mum's birthday on Friday (we're seeing her Saturday) so I need to buy her a card, and perhaps a little pressie - perhaps some flowers or something. It's also my step-mother's birthday, and she's having a party on Sunday. AND, since these last few months have just been completely time consuming, there's a few kids in the family whose birthday moneys I forgot to send, (twins in January, and a boy in May) so I need to get that sorted as well, as they will likely be at the party on Sunday.

Oh, and just before I go today, I want to say thank you to Becca for that fab link to "Wordle" she put on her diary! I went and made one of my own, and it was surprising the words that came out bigger! And also made me see that I use the word "Anyway" much too often! Haha. And "just".

Here it is, anyway. Enjoy! :)

Monday 21 July 2008

22 weeks 2 days - weepy hormoney entry, Robert's journey so far.

What to say! First off, I had a nice time over at the in-laws, we showed off the mountain of bits we got for Robert at Mothercare to them! We got some bedding, a wall thermometer, some sleepsuits, some bodysuits, socks, booties, a pack of white essentials including hat and mittens, other bits and bobs, either blue (yay!) or white, or cream, or cream with green/yellow. But my FAVOURITE bit we bought at Mothercare has to be THIS gorgeous snowsuit! I could practically weep looking at it! I just cannot wait until November just so I get to wrap up my tiny Robert in that gorgeous gorgeous suit to take home! The hormones certainly kick in whenever I look at all the gorgeous clothing we have bought for him, and find myself with tears in my eyes. I opened out one of the tiny blue bodysuits we got him, and it's just so tiny and adorable, I did almost burst into tears. When we were walking around the shop, we saw this giftset and I just really really wanted to get it! But we decided not to, because we might get sets like that when he's born from family and friends.

Anyway, enough rambling about clothes! Jonathan felt Robert kick again last night. Shortly after the kick he felt, Robert kicked twice more in fairly quick succession, but Jonathan didn't feel them, probably because the kick had moved slightly, and I think it was under J's fingertips rather than his palm or the length of his fingers. Jonathan is just so in awe of them, and he seems so excited to be a daddy. I knew from even before we got together that he'd make a wonderful father. He's just such a wonderful, sensitive, and caring man. Goodness, here comes the hormones again!

I just feel so lucky to have both a wonderful husband and be 22 weeks pregnant with our first child. All the years I spent worrying I wouldn't be able to get pregnant, and then when we were finally ready to start trying, the worry that I wouldn't be able to conceive for months on end. That first month where we started trying half way through the month and didn't get pregnant. Followed by the delayed period over stress... followed by practically a whole month of trying every other day, at the end of which we moved, and then on a whim, on day 32 of my cycle, taking a test and seeing the faintest of faint lines, not daring to hope incase it was all wrong. Two days later getting a stronger line and feeling over the moon! Followed by several tough weeks of tiredness, hunger, slight queasiness, and faith and hope. Then getting to see our little Sausage finally at 12 weeks pregnant! Hearing the heartbeat 4 weeks later at week 16, starting to feel little movements from within. Hearing it again at around week 20 to ease worrying after no movements for a while. A week or so later the movements started up again, but turned into little "bubbly" kicks! Then at just before 22 weeks seeing our little Robert Sausage again, and his daddy feeling his kicks too.

The three of us have already been on such an amazing journey, and we're barely past half way until we meet our tiny man, and get to hold him in our arms and nurture him, and care for him! He has been part of our lives since FEBRUARY, even though we didn't know he had started his amazing journey until a few weeks later. I cannot believe how much I love this little man already.

Saturday 19 July 2008

22 weeks! Birthday, plans for today, etc

Good morning girls! (just)

My birthday went quite nicely. Well after Jonathan got home anyway, before then it was a bit samey, but he got home, then I opened pressies, he got me some nice lush bubblebath bars I dropped a hint on a while ago, and I was SO surprised he remembered! He also bought me a cake tin (hehe) because I was saying how I kept getting urges to make cakes but as we don't have a cake tin, we can't. Also, he found that step thing that had been advertised on tv I said I could do with - the one from JML that folds up and gets put in the cupboard easily. The only thing is, I'm nearly at the weight limit for it :( So I might not be able to use it for much longer since I will gain a lot more weight by the end of the pregnancy, and it will take me over the 100kg - (I'm literally just under it now - between 99 and 100kg). Also got some DVDs and some choccies, and a maternity pillow, that I can use in bed and while sitting during pregnancy, and while breastfeeding! Ingenious things! :)

After presents, we decided we'd go for an early dinner, and there was a Frankie and Benny's right by the cinema in Kettering, so we thought we'd go to the cinema afterwards. Anyway, we ended up having loads of time after the meal before the movie started, so we went back home inbetween, and then came back for the movie, at which point we had real trouble finding a parking space. Doh! But yeah, the meal was soooo nice, we had potato skins to start, then I had an absolutely delicious chicken dish, which is on this page but I can't link it directly - it's the mozerella and pepperoni stuffed one. And then had brownies and cream for dessert. The film we went to see, Hancock - was brilliant! A bit of action, a lot of comedy, and also some nice romantic bits in it too, awww. :)

I also when we got back sent another facebook message to my sister, because it seemed that when I apologised for how much I yelled at her on the phone, she took it to mean I was apologising for what I said as well, which I wasn't, since I was still annoyed that she told my dad for me, but just that I should have waited until the morning before yelling (or not actually yelling, but talking more civilised) at her. And yes, I was more upset at my sister than at my dad, and while I understand she only did it because she was so excited about getting another nephew, she's 24, and should be able to control her emotions by now lol.. but yeah I don't know the exact reason I was crying because of the phone call from my dad, whether it was because I was upset that he was upset, or upset because I wasn't the one to call him, or upset for forgetting he was not working very much, or upset for not sending him the text (which by the way didn't say the sex in it, just "We know what it is!" so I don't know if he thought I'd sent a text saying "It's a boy!!!" to everyone except him). Or maybe just a combination of all of them. To be honest I don't even know if my sister actually told him the sex, or if he was just annoyed that he didn't get a text message, or if he was annoyed that he obviously didn't get a call before her. Anyway, what's done is done, and there's no need to dwell on it furthur.

Today, if the weather holds out, we are going for a picnic, probably, or if not, I've suggested that we go out shopping for some things for Robert :) Or maybe we could do both! But I would like to go and buy a few little bits for Robert I think because all we have for him clothing wise is the three babygrows my dad got us from France. Size 3-6 months ;) So we'd need to at least get him an outfit for the hospital and trip home, etc, and possibly just a set of normal baby grows etc to start us off. And it would be lovely to get some nice blue stuff to umm and awww over! ;)

Anyway, will leave it here, but just before I go I will say that Jonathan felt Robert kick again last night, although it wasn't as strong, he said it just felt like my belly shaking a bit, like when you laugh. The kicks he felt the night before my birthday were a lot clearer, so I'm guessing Robert wasn't in as good a position this time!

Hope you are all well! Until next time!

Ok, small edit, we're going to do some weeding and spare room sorting today, as the weather's quite windy, although dry, and then tomorrow we're going to head over to the mothercare in Northampton ready for opening time, buy some bits for Robert, and then head over to the in-laws for Sunday lunch, who live in a small village just a few minutes out of Northampton. So a nice productive weekend hopefully. :)

Friday 18 July 2008

21 weeks 6 days - Bittersweet evening last night, and birthday today!

Hi! Back again! Thanks so much girls for all your comments! I know I would have loved a little girl, but now I know it's a little BOY I'm so excited! And getting to name him too the day we knew he was a HE is just so great! Seems I'm following on with that tradition in family to have boys first afterall!

Last night was a little bitter-sweet truth be told. I put off telling my dad because I wasn't sure of his working hours (he's a tutor, and as such he works long days sometimes, and short days other times, but interrupting him on his mobile is bad :S ) Anyway, I thought maybe with school exams finished he might have LESS work, but still I didn't want to disturb him, so I thought I would wait until the evening when he knew he'd be back, and then call him! Anyway, he ended up calling ME, and I thought "great!" but then he started a tyrade at me, because my sister had said on the phone to him "Have you heard? Have you heard??" earlier on, and because I hadn't got around to calling him yet, he thought I was leaving him out and just not telling him! I ended up bursting into tears on the phone to him, and tried to explain why I'd not called him before, or whatever, at which point he started apologising to me, but I still feel bad, because I know I should have texted him alongside everyone else, but I still feel a little mad at my sister for blurting that out to him before I'd had the chance to tell him myself. I told him amongst sobs that he was going to have another grandson, but urgh, I just felt horrid for ages after. I wanted to just hang up the phone, but Dad soon said goodbye and we hung up anyway. I then spent the next 20 minutes crying and hugging J. When I calmed down, we sat down to watch a film, but I kept running in my head the situation, and eventually got him to pause it, went upstairs and had a bit of a go at my sister, primarily to make sure she hadn't blurted out anything to my brother either, who I hadn't got around to calling yet. She assured me she hadn't, so I called up my brother to tell him he was going to have a nephew. :)

It's nice in a way, 2 boys so close in age, only a year apart. :)

But yeah, the whole evening sort of was very "bleugh" because of the whole "Dad" incident, and then later I thought I'd do a mini-game on the wii fit, and J told me he felt uneasy me doing it (it was the hula hoop one), at which point I threw a bit of a mini strop, flung the wii remote on the sofa and went upstairs to let J do his 30 minutes on the wii board. He came up and said he didn't feel like doing his exercise afterall, which made me feel bad (again!) for being the one to stop him doing so, and anyway, we ended up laying on bed and talking about the evening and stuff. I was still in a very "bleughy" mood, and said "urgh, birthdays are so crap these days..." and then went on to say that they're not like they used to be, which again made him feel like shit because he took that to mean I didn't appreciate his efforts to make my birthdays nice, which wsn't what I meant it to sound like! And I realised as soon as it was out of my mouth what it must have sounded like to him, which made me feel bad again, urgh.

Anyway, we eventually sort of settled everything out, and were just laying there, and J asked me a question, something like "how are you feeling now?" and I said "ok, I guess, and Robert's kicking too". Anyway, J put his hand on my tummy, and I was thinking it's too early for him to feel anything, surely, but then Robert kicked again, and J said "Was that a kick??" :) He felt another one shortly afterwards as well! And then Robert stopped kicking, so he took his hand away and we just sort of laid there, looking into each others faces, and smiling. I asked him how it felt, and he replied that it wasn't very strong, but it felt like someone kicking his hand (lol, men!), and then I asked how it made him feel, and he said "happy, good".

I was so not expecting J to be able to feel Robert's kicks for ages - til at LEAST week 24, possibly 26, because of my size, but I guess Robert must have been lying with his back towards MY back as I was laying on the bed, and kicking up towards my tummy. Any other position I don't think he would be able to be felt from the outside!

But anyway, thanks to my little Robbie, we fell asleep happy with each other and in good moods. :) And hopefully it'll only be another 5 hours before Jonathan gets home today! And then I can open birthday pressies! And go out for a yummy meal tonight. Happy birthday to you too, Sarah! I know a lot of people who share my birthday, including a girl from my old primary school class, and a girl I met on IRC about 5-6 years ago! (or more, actually lol) And now Sarah too! Oh, and my old Catholic priest had my birthday as well. (And Richard Branson, and Nelson Mandella hehe)

But hope you're all well! Thanks for reading, and again for the comments. I love to hear what you all think. :)

Thursday 17 July 2008

21 weeks 5 days - scan! It's a...........

I'm baaaaaaaa-aaaack! :) Sausage is completely healthy, they found no problems whatsoever, although the pint and a half of orange juice I had before the scan certainly worked well - Sausage didn't stop moving at all during the scan, the sonographer had trouble checking the spine and heart!

Just to draw out your suspense some more, I'll add some of the pictures we got to take home with us! :) We DID get to find out the sex, and you will find out by the time you finish reading this entry!

First off, she took a LOT of pictures of Sausage sucking his/her thumb (teehee, I'm so not going to give it away just yet!), or general profile shots, so I'll add these first - and ooh Sausage looks soo cute... especially in this first one - thumb firmly in mouth!

We also have a picture of one of Sausage's arms and legs..

We did get a photo of what appeared to be just one of Sausage's arms - with what looked like the head just behind, but it wasn't very interesting as it just looked like an arm, so we left it out.

But yeah, she spent ages checking the various things, but we got our "inbetween the legs" shot fairly soon after she started...

That's right, it's a boy!!! We have our Robert Stephen!

Right at the beginning of the scan, we got such a nice view of his face, and we even saw his mouth opening and closing! And not long after, he found his thumb hehe.

Anyway, since you've all been dying for this entry, I'll post it now! Pictures took longer than expected to get uploaded and resized etc, which is why it's so late. But enjoy! :) And yay, I am really happy!

Wednesday 16 July 2008

21 weeks 4 days - small accident but all is well

Less than 24 hours now until the scan! At last! I was a bit silly last night though, we went out to eat, and as we came out of the restaurant, I walked straight into one of the bollards they had outside! It wasn't enough to hurt, and Sausage is still kicking away merrily in there, so I think there was nothing to worry about. I just LOVE the feeling. I cannot say it enough! If I could lay down all day and feel Sausage kick and kick, I would! It really does feel like a bubble popping inside my tummy whenever s/he kicks, but the bubble is getting stronger and stronger every day! I haven't felt any of those "rolling" feelings for several weeks now. Maybe it just feels like kicks when s/he does it these days. I don't know, all I know is I'm feeling the kicks and movements of some kind, and that's good enough for me!

Anyway, the next entry you see will hopefully have the BIG NEWS in it, and also some new lovely pictures of my little Sausage! Cross your fingers that Sausage shows all! Thanks for reading, see you tomorrow! Squeeee! :)

Tuesday 15 July 2008

21 weeks 3 days - kicks and punches!

Eeeep! 8am I got up, because Jonathan brought me a cup of tea in bed before leaving, and I didn't want it to get cold. He usually leaves around 9am, but he wants to work overtime this week because it's a deadline week for him this week, which means he can't take off my birthday (Friday - same as yours Sarah?), especially since he has Thursday off for the scan. So he's trying to do an hour of flexi-time each day so he can get Friday afternoon off so at least he can spend some of it with me :) But yeah, usually he works til later in the evening, but he said last night he'd try and get in to work earlier so he can leave around the same time. I just assumed he wouldn't be able to, since he does like staying in bed! ;)

Thanks for the comments yesterday Sarah, I saw that flash family thing on someone else's website, and thought it was really cute! So pleased they had a pregnant woman model hehe! Will have to change it when the baby is born though to make me unpregnant, and to add in the baby! ;)

Becca, I am so looking forward to the scan on Thursday it's unbelievable - part of me though is wondering why other people are excited and looking forward to it too! I mean, I know why I'm excited, but I didn't feel the same way on knowing that my SIL was having her scan (although granted, she never actually TOLD me she was having any of her scans, and seemed to tell me pregnancy related stuff rather grudgingly), or when I knew Alice was going for hers with the boys (but then I can attribute that to not having ever been pregnant myself and not really knowing or understanding what a big deal these scans are for the parents). I was probably more excited about yours, since it's one of the only scans that have happened since I myself have had a scan, and can truly understand what the big deal is about! Hehe.

Anyway, it seems that in my head I have a constant countdown running! 2 days, 5 hours from now I will be lying on that table. Yeeee-haw! :D

Back again to the movements - I am so thrilled, because Sausage has definitely definitely become more active. I felt him/her kick and punch me on at least 4-5 occasions throughout the day for several minutes each time! Each time I felt something, if I wasn't busy doing anything, I'd run to the bed, and lay down so I could feel the movements more easily, and just marvel in the tiny prodding feelings in my tummy. I think that word sums up how I feel at the moment - marvelous - in the sense that every time I feel him/her kick I just marvel at it, and it makes me so happy. Primarily that when s/he is kicking, I know that my little Sausage is still alright, but also just because it is a wonderful, fabulous feeling, one that I feel so priveledged and lucky to have felt. And I still think back to how quickly we got pregnant with awe and thankfulness. I cannot believe how lucky we were to have got pregnant so quickly!

I know it took my SIL several months to conceive - or so she implied anyway, she mentioned to me "every month I got my period it was such a heartbreak". But now she's got a tiny little boy (I say tiny, he's 7 and a half months old now!) who I know she loves to pieces. And I know that her parents particularly couldn't be more happy - they have three girls, the older two (Nicky is the youngest) don't have children. One of them doesn't WANT them, and the other one that does has found out she can't have them. So Nicky's the only one who's been able to give them a grandchild.

I do sometimes wonder who will actually give Sausage his/her second cousin - will it be my brother and SIL again? Or will it be J's sister and her fiance? I don't expect it will be my sister to give Sausage his/her second cousin - maybe 4th or 5th? ;) Oh my gosh - when J's sister has a baby, boy, that baby will be a stunner. She's just so effortlessly gorgeous! There's a picture of her and her (now) fiance here, but you can only see the back of her head in that one, however here's a photo of her here.

Anyway.... eeeshk, I can talk for Britain once I get rambling! Only one more entry to go (possibly two) before the big scan entry! Wooohoooo!

Monday 14 July 2008

21 weeks 2 days - more movements, gender thoughts.

Thanks linds for commenting. :) I thought it was cute too :D

I'm just so happy right now, although last night I got a bit depressed, thinking how on earth I was going to get through the next three days without completely going barmy. But now a new day is here I feel great, and happy, and best of all, Sausage does seem to be waking up now! And moving more than ever! I got lots and lots of movements during the day, and then at night, I got more movements again! I don't think it was hiccups this time, as they felt stronger. I was half expecting it to be able to be felt from the outside, but when I put my hand over the spot, Sausage stopped making them! :) I know that as the movements get REALLY strong, if they carry on being at night when I'm settling down to sleep they will become more and more annoying, but for now, I absolutely love them! And I just feel so great in knowing that Sausage is still thriving in there, and absolutely loving each and every move s/he makes.

Oh gosh, I really cannot WAIT until I can stop calling Sausage s/he and him/her and so on. I can't wait to call HIM Robert, or HER Chloe! And now I'm not nearly worrying as much about the wellbeing of Sausage, I'm looking forward to the scan so much, and thinking what a great birthday present it is to be able to see my first little one again the day before my birthday! And oh my goodness - even better if I get to find out the sex! I really do want to know, but if in the end it's not possible, then I think I could eventually come around to dealing with having a surprise.

In my mind though, I still think Sausage is a boy. Although to me now the %s are 50/50, I am thinking it's a boy probably because I know I would love a girl - and that way if it's a boy there is no surprise. But also I cannot help but think that family trends are huge and somehow irrefutable! Apart from my uncle from my mum's side, and my auntie from my dad's side both of which had a girl first, the REST of my entire family, and J's - have had a boy first. And likewise - my step-mother's family seems to be following the opposite trend - girls first. But there is the part of me that is sensible and logic based that thinks "don't be so stupid, it's 50/50 chance every time. That's why there have been exceptions in your extended family that break the 'boy first' rule".

Ah well, I guess time will tell! Three days to go! (although it would have been today, and I would have known by now if they hadn't changed the appointment! Grrr.)

J was on the phone to his parents yesterday evening, I guessed anyway because I am pretty sure he was talking about my birthday with them, I think they asked him what I wanted, and also they asked what we were doing at the weekend. It turns out we're going over to their house for a roast dinner on Sunday, and I wouldn't be surprised if they bought me a birthday cake, they seem to do that every year, it's so sweet! :) They really have treated me like one of their own. And I feel so proud that I get to give birth to their first grandchild! Anyway, I'll leave this here for now, my arms and legs seem to have got better from their extended exercises on Thursday and Friday, so will probably go on the wii fit again today for a while.

I hope you're all well, and I look forward to reading your next installments soon! x

Sunday 13 July 2008

21 weeks 1 day - hiccups! :D

21 weeks and 1 day! I'm in a very good mood today, because last night I had another first, and I'm pretty sure I know what it was!

Sausage had the hiccups! :D I was laying in bed, just getting ready to fall asleep, when I felt some things inside me, not extremely strong movements, but very obvious all the same... little blips from within, in the same place! :) They started out fairly regular and then got quite irregular before eventually stopping. But it was so cute! And again has put my mind at rest a little - rolls and jabs from Sausage have been extremely lacking again since s/he got woken up from the midwife hearing the heartbeat, so it was really nice to feel those little blips from within :D

I do really wish Sausage would perk up a bit, I really enjoy feeling him/her move around a lot in there, and wish I could feel it clearly every day. Lately it just feels like I'm having to forget about the fact that I'm pregnant and hoping a movement will catch me offguard so I know Sausage is still ok in there. Otherwise I might go crazy with worry. But I now only have 4 and a bit days to wait until the scan, which makes me feel SO much better. And so glad that the next midwife appointment afterwards is only 2 weeks on from the scan. Although I think I made it a bit early - I must have got confused as to the days. I think I made it for 23+4 instead of 24+4, and I'm wondering whether I should change the appointment for the next week on. As it's supposed to be a 24 week checkup.

Anyway, I'll leave the entry here, on a high. So glad I felt Sausage again! :)

Thursday 10 July 2008

20 weeks 5 days - Wii Fit! Feeling great!

One week to go until the scan! Woooohooo! It's so exciting. :) Thanks girls for all your lovely comments about my photos. I was very nervous about putting that full length one on - my hair is doing a weird floopy thing, and just look very... fat. It's weird, but I don't look that fat in the mirror. Ah well!

Anyway, some good news! Firstly, I've been feeling a few more movements today. Still nothing huge, but about 2 minutes ago I definitely felt Sausage movements, and hey, any movement is better than none. :) I really can't wait for it to become strong enough to make my belly wobble! And for J to feel it, but I feel that it won't be for a good few weeks to come yet.

Secondly, I've been having a great day today. I've been quite (ok, very) lazy the past ermm.. few months? And it just makes me so lethargic and bleugh, like I just don't feel like doing anything. But yesterday, during the day, a package arrived for J that I didn't know about, I figured I shouldn't open it, just incase it was something for my birthday next week, instead I emailed him and told him it had arrived, and he replied saying "Oh, I wasn't expecting that for a while! I didn't tell you about it because it's a surprise, but maybe you can see if you can wait til tonight?" And since before I got this reply I had fallen asleep on the sofa for 3 hours, it was already about 5pm, and so only had a couple more hours til J was due to get home, so I told him I'd wait. Anyway.... It was a Wii Fit! Now they're extremely popular, and for some reason, Nintendo don't make enough for everyone who wants one to buy them straight away, so getting them is a pain in the bum, to put it lightly. Anyway, J managed to get one by subscribing to a stock checker, and the things usually sell out in SECONDS but thanks to a website error, even though he got to the webpage a couple of minutes after the stock was announced, it still let him order one! And I guess he got into the first lot of the next batch that way!

But anyway, we had a little play with it last night, set it up and so on... Unsurprisingly it said I was obese - with a BMI of 33.04. I'm going to be careful not to overdo it, and make sure I only stick to the light exercises on there, but it can't hurt to get a bit of exercise daily using that and to try and tone up a little. Just got to make sure I take care of myself, and make sure I eat enough for the 2 of us, and healthily, and not to strain myself a lot. But it's exciting, and fun! The games on there are very addictive, and as well as helping your weight, they also help your posture, and so on.

Anyway, earlier today I went on there and did an hour's worth of exercise, only with the light stuff, like the stepping games, and the balance games, but it was still good and got me sweating a bit :) And I just feel so GREAT and energetic.

J wants to use it to tone up and get down to his ideal weight by the time the baby is born. He wants to tone up his upper body mainly, get rid of his "man boobs" as he calls them. But as it is, he's less than 1 BMI into the "overweight" category, curses to him and his tallness! ;) Whereas I'm 3 BMI into the OBESE category! The shame :( I think I was only 31 BMI when I got pregnant, which means I've put on quite a bit in that time. Ah well, I guess I have a pretty good excuse for putting on weight, but I still don't want to put on more than I have to, because it's gotta come off after the baby's born!

Anyway, hope you're all ok! xx

Tuesday 8 July 2008

20 weeks 3 days - belly pics

I've added new belly pictures to the belly gallery. One full shot, and one normal. Can definitely see the difference now from week 12, but my belly looks the same as it did 2 weeks ago, to me. Ah well.

Anyway, I decided to take a variety of shots this week to mark the special HALFWAY point! So I took a bare belly shot, as well as a clothed belly shot as well, which I won't clutter the belly gallery with, instead will post them here.


Here you can see my stretchmarks (eeshk!) which are mainly from when I got fat, rather than new ones from pregnancy. Although pregnancy's not helping them! ;) Hopefully though those might be the only ones I get, but we'll see! I am finding that my bump is incredibly itchy some days, but luckily I've been given some gifts - some oil to spray and rub on (and smells sooo nice! Citrussy), and also some body lotion, both specifically designed for pregnant women and stretchmarks etc. I'm holding in the top bit of flub here to give you a better idea of baby bump, which is all below the belly button. One of J's parents' friends came over with them (actually J's gran's best friend before she passed on) recently, and she patted my belly... only she was patting the flub bit not the baby bump! lol.


Here's my clothed bump. When I get really big I think I'll really like this top, it'll emphasise my bump more with the stripes.

The normal belly shot and the full length one are in the gallery, so head on over there to see them.

I think when I saw the midwife yesterday, her poking my belly with the doppler must have woken Baby Sausage up - felt quite a bit of activity there last night, and also this morning, although it's been less like pokes and prods, and more like general body movement, and yes, definitely feels quite low down. But so pleased I'm feeling it again - maybe the reassurance that Sausage is ok in there is making me more receptive to his/her movements.

Anyway, I'll leave it there for now. Thanks again girls. xx

Monday 7 July 2008

20 weeks 2 days - seeing midwife today

Thanks for your comments girls... I know it's probably just normal "first time mum" worries.. but anyway I spent a while trying to get through to the midwife earlier, couldn't get her on her mobile, so called via the doctors surgery, who told me she was there today, and they gave her a message. She called back really quick (within half an hour or so), and told me that she'd fit me in after surgery to listen in and check everything was ok and to put my mind at rest. I probably sounded a lot worse and more worried because I had just run up the stairs to answer the phone and was a little puffed out (So unfit! tsk). But yes, I'm sure everything's going to be fine, and it'll all be good, but it will stop me worrying until my scan next Thursday (not this Thursday, the thursday after), and maybe be more receptive to baby's movements.

Anyway, I did what Becca said today, laid down and felt my belly, and yeah I think baby must be over on my left hand side, quite high up, as I feel a lot more solid there than on the right. I'm just pleased that from today, there's going to be less than 2 weeks until my scan, and then just over 2 weeks until my 24 week appointment, and from then on hopefully I'll have regular 4 week checkups so I know it won't be as long as this one - which is almost 6 weeks from my last appointment with the midwife to the scan.

Anyway, will be heading over to the doctors in about an hour's time, so I'll edit this post later this evening to say how it went (for any of you who might read between now and then). Thanks for your support girls, I feel like such a pregnancy "newbie" here. It means so much to have your experienced comments when I feel stressed and worried about such things. xx

Edit: Just got back from the midwife (half hour after leaving the house!), we heard the heartbeat, all is fine.. phew. She found it, then a couple of seconds later, lost it, apparently baby had moved! hehe. But yay, so pleased.

And yay! Half way! 20 weeks pregnant! Will go sort photos now for the belly gallery.

Sunday 6 July 2008

20 weeks 1 day - some worries

Twenty weeks! Wow! I'd feel a lot more happy about it though if I wasn't so worried at the moment. After I had that really active day (I think I posted about, it came just after the few days of nothing), I had a day where I only felt Sausage once or twice. Then I have had another few days of nothing. Or possibly nothing. I don't know, definitely not anything that's undeniably Sausage. So I'm worrying and worrying and hoping I'll feel some Sausage movements again soon. If I don't feel any definite movements today I will call the midwife tomorrow.

Something else that's not serving to ease my mind is that someone on a pregancy forum I read, who was due the same date as me (well, same date by dating scan, one day after by official EDD) lost her baby a couple of days ago :( She went to the midwife following brown bleeding and the midwife couldn't find a heartbeat, they sent her to the hospital where they confirmed that the baby had died and they gave her some tablets to induce labour to deliver the baby. Just short of 20 weeks :(

Anyway, last night I managed to sleep without my bra for the first time practically since I got pregnant. I took it off because I got grass all over and inside it from when we mowed the lawn earlier today and I was helping holding the bag open for J.

I have taken some 20 week belly pics, but they are full length ones. I will take some other ones in the mirror later today. Urgh, the full length ones are horrid. I look so huge and flubbery and bleugh. And my belly just looks like flub. So I'm wondering whether I want to post them or not. I'll see how I feel after I have taken the mirror ones.

Anyway, hope you are well. Thanks for reading x

Wednesday 2 July 2008

19 weeks 4 days - wriggly day yesterday!

Yesterday was just wonderful! Sausage moved around so much! It was so lovely to feel so many movements, all throughout the day. I'm so so so glad I've now reached this part in the pregnancy, where occasionally I'll be taken by surprise by a little wriggle inside me, and be reminded that I am pregnant! That I have finally got my dream I've had for over 4 years, and that I'm finally starting my own little family. The feeling inside of my little Sausage moving around is just the weirdest thing I have felt, but at the same time, the most amazing, natural, and wonderful feeling. I'm so glad and happy to be pregnant. And I just can't wait until the scan! And so happy that this time I can be sure that Sausage is ok beforehand. It will be good to check that Sausage still has all the right bits in the right places, and that s/he is healthy and growing fine. And I also cannot wait to find out whether s/he is a she or a he ;)

On my due date forum, November, not many people have had their scans yet, but so far there are definitely more boys than girls. And people are getting their scans all the time. Someone who has their due date on 23rd (mine is 22nd) is getting theirs next Monday I think. Pfff, how unfair! ;)

Anyway, I'll leave it here for the time being. I hope over the coming days I get a lot more days like yesterday. Wriggle, Sausage, wriggle! xx

Tuesday 1 July 2008

19 weeks 3 days - soo hungry! Sausage must be having a growth spurt

Woohooo! It's July! One of my favourite months of the year, and especially this year. It's just over 2 weeks until the scan now, and I'm so excited about it! And it's much nicer now in the run up because I was worrying like mad before the 12 week scan, and now, if I get worried all I need to do is wait for Sausage to move around in there and I know all is okay. S/he has been squirming a lot in there today. I feel like my belly is going through a bit of a growth phase, I have become a lot more aware of it, and I'm nearly at the stage where I can't lie down on my belly anymore. I suppose that's one good thing about being fat! I have been able to lie down on my front with little to no discomfort, and it's only just now getting to the stage where if I want to I have to be really careful when lying down. Jonathan doesn't like it when I do lie on my front. He also doesn't like it when I poke my belly (usually to find the top of my uterus, which I think is right at my belly button now, or a tiny bit below).

I can't believe that in 4 days I will be TWENTY weeks pregnant. Half way! I just can't believe how quick it's gone these past few weeks. Over the last few days, I've been feeling so incredibly hungry practically all the time. I had a fairly late breakfast, around 11am, where I had FOUR slices of toast. I'm already starving again! This baby really must be packing on the ounces (hehe) right now, if my hunger is anything to go by. I think for lunch I'll make myself a huge salad, and a jacket potato with cheese and perhaps some beans to go with it. I'm ashamed to say that I've been eating a lot of junk just recently, lots of ice cream and ice lollies (I must say those are my top vices! hehe. I absolutely ADORE ice cream.). I am also quite a crisp junkie too, I can't just have ONE bag of crisps in one sitting, let alone in a day. So J and I have not bought any in the last few weeks. Chocolate too! Oh my gosh, I got the most strange urge yesterday to make a chocolate cake. I've never made a cake in my life. Hmm actually that was a lie, I made silly little victoria sponges for school, and little muffin things. But at home, on my own, I've never made one. Never made a chocolate cake either. But I realllllly want to make one! Only problem is, I don't have a cake tin! Hehe! Might have to go shopping in Woolies, or Wilkinsons, and buy some cheapo kitchen stuff we really should have had by now ;)

Anyway, I'll try and make sure this week to get a full length shot of the belly as well as the normal one in my wardrobe mirror!

Hope you're all well! xx