As most of you know, our little Squidge arrived at 9.08pm yesterday (25th September) weighing an absolutely diddy 7lb 9oz! Little Christopher Jon is absolutely perfect and has been breastfeeding for every feed. Due to my diabetes they are checking his blood sugar levels pre feeds, and so far they have not been satisfactory, due to him being quite sleepy and not actually crying for milk yet! It has been an effort to keep him awake and for him to actually have a good long feed, although he did manage it for his last feed, where he fed well for over an hour! So fingers crossed for his next BM.
On the matter of the birth, in a nutshell I had given birth vaginally within 12 hours of being given my first and only pessary! I did also need to have my waters broken, during this process I used gas and air but other than that I didn't use any pain relief despite the contractions being a lot more intense and uncomfortable much earlier on than with Robert's labour.
All in all, my birth experience was very much a positive one, although, maybe due to the speed in which the 2nd phase progressed, I have no idea how on earth I managed to get a 10lb baby out! There was also a time I panicked because Jonathan had asked me when I last felt Squidge move and then realised I couldn't remember, so I really panicked until I was monitored. I had the worst case scenario of Squidge already being dead and there being nothing we could do... but luckily of course Squidge was alright!
I am waiting for him to wake for his feed and he either just pooed or farted, so I might change him and see if he wakes. Hopefully I can update this tomorrow from home, but I'll keep you informed! I can't wait to write his birth story!
Showing posts with label Squidge. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Squidge. Show all posts
Sunday, 26 September 2010
Thursday, 23 September 2010
38 weeks pregnant - niggles and belly pic
Well 38 weeks pregnant today, 2 days until D-Day. The last two evenings I've had niggles which feel promising but I've been trying not to get too excited. The best I am hoping for at the moment is that these niggles mean things are getting things ready, and that it means that when I am induced on Saturday things will be fairly speedy... I have been getting some looser BM (and some normal ones too), been getting some achiness in my lower back, off to one side mainly but sometimes all the way across (which I never had with R), and also some mild achiness/pain in my lower bump, and also some much stronger braxton hicks than I have been having all the way through my pregnancy, ones which are also lasting longer than normal. It's strange how little I remember from my pregnancy with Robert. But reading back on his last few days in the womb, I am now pretty certain that even if things are on their way they probably won't have time now to kickstart themselves now before the induction. I do hope though that things get going quickly and without needing the drip. Fingers crossed anyway!!
I took a belly picture today, to complete this pregnancy's gallery. I noticed before I took them that I by complete co-incidence had exactly the same top and trousers on that I had for my 36 week belly picture! So had to change the top ;)
Tomorrow is my last full definite day as a Mum of 1. There is a bit still to be done, but not a lot is actually URGENT. So hopefully... we'll be ok :)
I took a belly picture today, to complete this pregnancy's gallery. I noticed before I took them that I by complete co-incidence had exactly the same top and trousers on that I had for my 36 week belly picture! So had to change the top ;)
Tomorrow is my last full definite day as a Mum of 1. There is a bit still to be done, but not a lot is actually URGENT. So hopefully... we'll be ok :)
Sunday, 19 September 2010
37 weeks 3 days - last week
It's Sunday 19th September. There are only 6 days until I get admitted to hospital for my induction. I have so much to do but it will all come together, and this last week will fly by and I think it would be nice to have a written record of how things are going in my last week as Mummy to one gorgeous boy. This time next week I really hope I will be cuddled up with my newest little baby, having had a labour that has gone swimmingly well.
Jonathan has gone into town to buy me a birthing ball (well, Gym Ball, but same difference, only cheaper), and to buy a hard backed envelope for Robert's cbeebies birthday card (another thing to finish before next weekend!).
I have been feeling Squidge engage a few times over the last couple of days, but then notice s/he has come back out again and feeling all squashed up again under my ribs. I've been averaging well over 3 cups of raspberry leaf tea a day for 3 weeks (at one point averaging 4 but got below that a bit now), and hoping that bouncing on the birthing ball this week may help things along. I've also been trying to ensure I have regular braxton hicks in the hope that it might help things along somehow, if not start labour then at least start getting things ready.
Things have been quite squashed up the last few days, and beginning to definitely get that "heavily pregnant" feeling. Last night we were at the in-laws sorting out induction weekend plans, and we had a Chinese takeaway in the evening. Leaving Jonathan, MIL and FIL nicely satiated, and me positively bloated having had the same amount! So much so I did have trouble tying my shoe laces to go home, having had no problems for the rest of the pregnancy particularly! I have been huffing and puffing a lot lately, even after not doing particularly much, which Jonathan has said is getting a little annoying but he can understand why I'm doing it, so he doesn't complain lol! I do feel lucky in that I know I only have 1 week to go, whereas if I wasn't being induced I'd be facing up to 5 weeks to go which seems like a huge amount more!
Squidge is still nice and active, apart from one sleepy day I think on Monday last week, and I rarely notice the times inbetween his many active moments! Some are more active than others, sometimes I just feel his bum/knee gently shift position and stick out of my belly gently, other times I feel a big "bloop" movement of his bum, combined with a foot sticking out one side of my belly, plus little hand swishing movements down there as well!
I've been a little looser in the bowel movement situation lately as well, which is getting my hopes up for an induction-free labour. I remember that two days before Robert was born we went out to a restuarant in the evening, and I went to the loo after the meal and had quite a large loose BM then. I keep feeling pressure in some sense or another as well, which of course may just be when Squidge is becoming engaged, and will mean nothing. Last night I was wondering if things might be getting ready for the beginning of things, as I felt small waves of sensations at the very bottom of my bump, but then stopped, and wondered if maybe they might have been related in some way to the bloatedness earlier in the evening, or Squidge engaging.
Only time will tell! But once I have wrapped up this entry I will be going and finishing my hospital bag, and also making notes on my birth plan and getting that typed up as well. Plus a list of last minute questions to ask my midwife tomorrow, as that will be my last antenatal appointment!
Also I don't know if I mentioned it here, but Squidge now does have a name set aside for him/her in either eventuality. :) I'm so pleased that I have kept the surprise for myself for the big day, I know there are many people who argue that it is a surprise whether you find out at 20 weeks, 30 weeks, or on the birthing day, but having known with Robert at 20 weeks, and not knowing with this one, I must admit there IS a difference... the anticipation and excitement not only of meeting your little baby and discovering whose nose he has, or whose eyes he has, but also the fact that you've not known all this time whether he is a boy or a girl, the anticipation for me seems to be a HUGE amount greater than it was with Robert. I just can't wait to find out whether Robert is having a brother or sister! And each day the excitement gets greater! I think that if we do have a third child, I would love to keep the sex a surprise again. I have not regretted keeping it a surprise at all, and to me, buying neutral clothes, neutral bedding, packing little white jackets and blankets does not make me feel "less prepared" as many people state as their reason for finding out, nor are we financially worse off, we have kept all of Robert's clothes, so if it's a boy, he can wear those as well as the neutral things (to give us a break of blue blue blue), and if it's a girl, then we can reuse some of the boys clothes (vests, socks etc) and keep the rest incase we have a third.
I love the way I've kept changing my mind on what I think it is... I had that huge chunk of time when I had a niggling feeling it was a girl, now I think it's a boy! I will be over the moon whatever our baby is, and just can't wait for Jonathan to tell me! (And I think he will enjoy that priviledge too, despite having wanted to find out at the scan!) I can't wait to hold my baby on my chest, feel his/her warmth on my body, and call him/her by name for the first time, and welcome little Squidge into the world by introducing them to Jonathan, my mum, the midwife by name.
I shall go now, and start doing all the things I need to get done. Finish packing the hospital bags and Robert's weekend bag, making notes on questions for the midwife and my birth plan.
I hope you all are having a lovely weekend! I will try and update this week, by Thursday at the latest with my last belly picture, and hopefully the news that all is ready, clothes are in drawers, boxes are in the loft, cot is clear, bags are packed and so on! Huge hugs to you all, I know this isn't quite the end of this pregnancy but it is drawing nearer and you have all been a fabulous source of support and comfort to me. Will update soon!
Jonathan has gone into town to buy me a birthing ball (well, Gym Ball, but same difference, only cheaper), and to buy a hard backed envelope for Robert's cbeebies birthday card (another thing to finish before next weekend!).
I have been feeling Squidge engage a few times over the last couple of days, but then notice s/he has come back out again and feeling all squashed up again under my ribs. I've been averaging well over 3 cups of raspberry leaf tea a day for 3 weeks (at one point averaging 4 but got below that a bit now), and hoping that bouncing on the birthing ball this week may help things along. I've also been trying to ensure I have regular braxton hicks in the hope that it might help things along somehow, if not start labour then at least start getting things ready.
Things have been quite squashed up the last few days, and beginning to definitely get that "heavily pregnant" feeling. Last night we were at the in-laws sorting out induction weekend plans, and we had a Chinese takeaway in the evening. Leaving Jonathan, MIL and FIL nicely satiated, and me positively bloated having had the same amount! So much so I did have trouble tying my shoe laces to go home, having had no problems for the rest of the pregnancy particularly! I have been huffing and puffing a lot lately, even after not doing particularly much, which Jonathan has said is getting a little annoying but he can understand why I'm doing it, so he doesn't complain lol! I do feel lucky in that I know I only have 1 week to go, whereas if I wasn't being induced I'd be facing up to 5 weeks to go which seems like a huge amount more!
Squidge is still nice and active, apart from one sleepy day I think on Monday last week, and I rarely notice the times inbetween his many active moments! Some are more active than others, sometimes I just feel his bum/knee gently shift position and stick out of my belly gently, other times I feel a big "bloop" movement of his bum, combined with a foot sticking out one side of my belly, plus little hand swishing movements down there as well!
I've been a little looser in the bowel movement situation lately as well, which is getting my hopes up for an induction-free labour. I remember that two days before Robert was born we went out to a restuarant in the evening, and I went to the loo after the meal and had quite a large loose BM then. I keep feeling pressure in some sense or another as well, which of course may just be when Squidge is becoming engaged, and will mean nothing. Last night I was wondering if things might be getting ready for the beginning of things, as I felt small waves of sensations at the very bottom of my bump, but then stopped, and wondered if maybe they might have been related in some way to the bloatedness earlier in the evening, or Squidge engaging.
Only time will tell! But once I have wrapped up this entry I will be going and finishing my hospital bag, and also making notes on my birth plan and getting that typed up as well. Plus a list of last minute questions to ask my midwife tomorrow, as that will be my last antenatal appointment!
Also I don't know if I mentioned it here, but Squidge now does have a name set aside for him/her in either eventuality. :) I'm so pleased that I have kept the surprise for myself for the big day, I know there are many people who argue that it is a surprise whether you find out at 20 weeks, 30 weeks, or on the birthing day, but having known with Robert at 20 weeks, and not knowing with this one, I must admit there IS a difference... the anticipation and excitement not only of meeting your little baby and discovering whose nose he has, or whose eyes he has, but also the fact that you've not known all this time whether he is a boy or a girl, the anticipation for me seems to be a HUGE amount greater than it was with Robert. I just can't wait to find out whether Robert is having a brother or sister! And each day the excitement gets greater! I think that if we do have a third child, I would love to keep the sex a surprise again. I have not regretted keeping it a surprise at all, and to me, buying neutral clothes, neutral bedding, packing little white jackets and blankets does not make me feel "less prepared" as many people state as their reason for finding out, nor are we financially worse off, we have kept all of Robert's clothes, so if it's a boy, he can wear those as well as the neutral things (to give us a break of blue blue blue), and if it's a girl, then we can reuse some of the boys clothes (vests, socks etc) and keep the rest incase we have a third.
I love the way I've kept changing my mind on what I think it is... I had that huge chunk of time when I had a niggling feeling it was a girl, now I think it's a boy! I will be over the moon whatever our baby is, and just can't wait for Jonathan to tell me! (And I think he will enjoy that priviledge too, despite having wanted to find out at the scan!) I can't wait to hold my baby on my chest, feel his/her warmth on my body, and call him/her by name for the first time, and welcome little Squidge into the world by introducing them to Jonathan, my mum, the midwife by name.
I shall go now, and start doing all the things I need to get done. Finish packing the hospital bags and Robert's weekend bag, making notes on questions for the midwife and my birth plan.
I hope you all are having a lovely weekend! I will try and update this week, by Thursday at the latest with my last belly picture, and hopefully the news that all is ready, clothes are in drawers, boxes are in the loft, cot is clear, bags are packed and so on! Huge hugs to you all, I know this isn't quite the end of this pregnancy but it is drawing nearer and you have all been a fabulous source of support and comfort to me. Will update soon!
Saturday, 28 August 2010
34 weeks 2 days - preparations
How crazy is it that it seems almost every time I update here the weeks seem to be one higher than the one before? The time is going so quickly. I thought it would drag once I got the diabetes diagnosis, but actually, it seems to have sped up. Especially since my consultant appointment!
The fact that they want to induce me at 38 weeks... something I have decided I would be happy with given the right circumstances "down there"... is making everything whoosh by in a blink of an eye. Not long til it's September, the most likely month of my baby's birth. I still can't believe it, that I might be having a baby NEXT MONTH when I had it in my head all along that it would be October.
I don't know what day they would want to do it, but if it is the date I am 38 weeks exactly it will be 23rd September. That is less than ONE month away. In fact it is 3 weeks 5 days away. I am scared, yet excited. There is so much to do, and one of those is sorting out the baby's sleeping arrangements. Of course in our room with us, but we have no moses basket (didn't have one with R, he went straight into the cotbed), and no other bed for R, so we went shopping today. Mainly window shopping, planning on buying a toddler bed for him, but in the end decided to buy a cot (not a cotbed) for Squidge, and we will convert his cotbed into the bed setting soon. We also needed more bedding and sheets, so bought those, and we'll be buying the cot on the internet.
Then we will be cleaning and tidying and packing away like CRAZY upstairs - lots of things to tidy out of reach for when Robert goes into his bed as he'll have free reign of everything in his room then! Going up in the loft etc to put things up and bring things down. It'll all be done hopefully before the baby is born but of course some things need to be prioritised!
Squidge is still somewhat of a wriggler. No big kicks as such anymore, but plenty of wriggles and "getting comfy" motions. I do find myself wondering what Squidge will look like, whether Squidge is a boy or a girl, what we'll call him if it's a boy, whether we'll keep our minds the same if it's a girl, how much hair, how the birth will go, how quickly I'll fall headfirst in love (unfortunately it took a while with Robert due to all those issues surrounding his birth). I also look forward to what the next 4 weeks bring. If my late pregnancy niggles will be as bad or not (weird thing to look forward to I guess, but maybe it's because so far they haven't been as bad??!!)
Also looking forward to all the rolling sweeping rippling movements on my belly, watching it bubble up and down. :) Less than 4 weeks. WOW. I really can't comprehend it!
The fact that they want to induce me at 38 weeks... something I have decided I would be happy with given the right circumstances "down there"... is making everything whoosh by in a blink of an eye. Not long til it's September, the most likely month of my baby's birth. I still can't believe it, that I might be having a baby NEXT MONTH when I had it in my head all along that it would be October.
I don't know what day they would want to do it, but if it is the date I am 38 weeks exactly it will be 23rd September. That is less than ONE month away. In fact it is 3 weeks 5 days away. I am scared, yet excited. There is so much to do, and one of those is sorting out the baby's sleeping arrangements. Of course in our room with us, but we have no moses basket (didn't have one with R, he went straight into the cotbed), and no other bed for R, so we went shopping today. Mainly window shopping, planning on buying a toddler bed for him, but in the end decided to buy a cot (not a cotbed) for Squidge, and we will convert his cotbed into the bed setting soon. We also needed more bedding and sheets, so bought those, and we'll be buying the cot on the internet.
Then we will be cleaning and tidying and packing away like CRAZY upstairs - lots of things to tidy out of reach for when Robert goes into his bed as he'll have free reign of everything in his room then! Going up in the loft etc to put things up and bring things down. It'll all be done hopefully before the baby is born but of course some things need to be prioritised!
Squidge is still somewhat of a wriggler. No big kicks as such anymore, but plenty of wriggles and "getting comfy" motions. I do find myself wondering what Squidge will look like, whether Squidge is a boy or a girl, what we'll call him if it's a boy, whether we'll keep our minds the same if it's a girl, how much hair, how the birth will go, how quickly I'll fall headfirst in love (unfortunately it took a while with Robert due to all those issues surrounding his birth). I also look forward to what the next 4 weeks bring. If my late pregnancy niggles will be as bad or not (weird thing to look forward to I guess, but maybe it's because so far they haven't been as bad??!!)
Also looking forward to all the rolling sweeping rippling movements on my belly, watching it bubble up and down. :) Less than 4 weeks. WOW. I really can't comprehend it!
Sunday, 22 August 2010
33 weeks 3 days - update, diabetes consultant.
I saw the diabetes consultant on Wednesday (at 32 weeks 6 days). Due to my diabetes, they want to induce me 2 weeks early at 38 weeks. Having had a few days to process this, I am reluctant to say yes if my cervix is not ready, but if it is ready I will most likely accept induction. They are happy to leave it to 40 weeks if I have twice-weekly monitoring but do not want my pregnancy to last any longer. I know I can refuse induction if I want to even then, but for now, I want to wait and see what happens.
I have an appointment on the 1st September again with the diabetes consultant, and as far as I am aware, I am going to get an internal on that date for them to assess my cervix. I will be 34 weeks 6 days pregnant then.
I am also expecting a growth scan date to come through the post for when I am around 36 weeks pregnant.
I am seeing Beverley (my midwife) again on the 6th September, so hopefully that won't clash with my scan.
I am thinking that I will accept induction if my cervix is getting ready. And I am actually getting quite eager about meeting my little baby, so I am going to try some home remedies to get it ready, so I am going to buy some raspberry leaf tea on Tuesday, going to try and get a birthing ball, extra walking, and so on. Not actually necessarily the labour inducing stuff, but the things that would help soften and shorten my cervix.
I will be 38 weeks pregnant on the 23rd September. I don't know if they would induce me bang on 38 weeks, but I think if I was... providing I'm ready... wow, my two children could both be born on the 23rd of the month! Robert would be exactly 22 months old if Squidge is born on 23rd September. I feel quite gobsmacked thinking that I could be giving birth a MONTH from tomorrow. When I found out I was pregnant, and due on 7th October, it never once crossed my mind that my baby could be a September baby. Robert came bang on time, but there was always the feeling that Squidge would be late.
I will be offered a sweep at 37 weeks, which would be my preferred method of induction if it works alone.
A week ago I felt a little depressed, and annoyed whenever anyone said to me "not long to go now" - for the record, I am NEVER saying that to a pregnant woman ever again unless she is in labour!!! Even if they only have 1 week to go, or a few days to go, or overdue! I now am feeling quite upbeat. I think the knowledge that if I want to I will be induced at 38 weeks has made a world of difference. It's like I know that if I get really fed up or in pain, or whatever, and I do just think "lets get the baby out" I will be able to at 38 weeks, and in fact they WANT me to. Even though at the moment I want to say no unless I am ready, if I change my mind I know my option is there, and that is just a nice comforting feeling I know from a completely selfish point of view but there we go!
Anyway so that's my situation!!
This weekend we went to Kent to see my family. I saw my brother and sister-in-law with my nephew Ewan as well which was lovely. The two boys got on better together than they did in November, but there were some sharing issues lol. Squidge and I got a lot of attention, particularly today at my Dad's party with a lot of people around. The boys got a lot of attention too, and there were so many people around it was hard to stay with Robert all the time, but there were always people around to stop anything from happening, and my step-mum's three nieces and nephews who are 13 and 14 were eager to play with both boys and keep them entertained, so I felt ok to sit and relax a bit.
Robert has had a bit of trouble with his routine this weekend with regards to nap and sleep, which resulted in a VERY grumpy and tearful little boy on Saturday night, who cried when he had to say goodbye to his Nanna, and who cried when he saw his other grandad and grandma, didn't want his teeth brushed, or his story read, or even milky, and just wanted to play with cars and threw a major tantrum and even when we put him to bed, we could hear him sobbing and calling out "car car!" He finally fell asleep but then he woke up half an hour earlier than normal the next morning, and getting him down for a nap at the normalish time (in an attempt to get his routine back on track) was a pain! But he slept then for a good amount of time, and once he was in the bath tonight before we set out for home, he was fine (although being persuaded to part from his teenage entertainers and supply of toy cars was a challenge!), and he fell asleep in the car home, and stayed sleepy after waking up when we arrived home, so he's fast asleep in his cot so here's hoping for a return to routine and a nice long sleep tonight!
Squidge is still nice and active, I get mainly wriggles and feet/elbows/hands brushing about, less kicks but when I do get a kick, they sometimes take my breath away and HURT! I love laying down and seeing Squidge wriggle about in there. I find it very comforting, and each day that passes my love and eagerness to meet Squidge grows.
There is always the feeling I think when you become pregnant with your second child, about how much you will be able to love them, how could you ever love your second child like you love your first. As the days and weeks go by, I just KNOW I will fall in love the second I see Squidge. I can't wait to call Squidge by his/her name (Boy's name STILL not decided, it probably won't be Christopher anymore but I really don't know!!!). I still have the feeling that Squidge is a girl, but tonight when I was making some tea, I don't know why but I suddenly imagined Squidge here, as a boy, and thinking "wow, a mum of 2 boys!" and that thought left a warm soft feeling inside me like I just know that even if Squidge isn't a girl like my instincts are telling me, that I will love my two boys so much, I will love BEING a mum to two boys! And strangely enough it felt at that moment "more right" if Squidge is a boy. Such an odd odd feeling but I just know that everything will be alright. My little Squidge... maybe connecting to the idea of having a boy will make it easier to find a name I like for a boy.
For now... we shall wait and see. I might only have another 4 weeks and 4 days to go of this pregnancy! It seems like such a short time now, and it really won't be long before I am beginning my next chapter, as a mum of TWO children!
I have an appointment on the 1st September again with the diabetes consultant, and as far as I am aware, I am going to get an internal on that date for them to assess my cervix. I will be 34 weeks 6 days pregnant then.
I am also expecting a growth scan date to come through the post for when I am around 36 weeks pregnant.
I am seeing Beverley (my midwife) again on the 6th September, so hopefully that won't clash with my scan.
I am thinking that I will accept induction if my cervix is getting ready. And I am actually getting quite eager about meeting my little baby, so I am going to try some home remedies to get it ready, so I am going to buy some raspberry leaf tea on Tuesday, going to try and get a birthing ball, extra walking, and so on. Not actually necessarily the labour inducing stuff, but the things that would help soften and shorten my cervix.
I will be 38 weeks pregnant on the 23rd September. I don't know if they would induce me bang on 38 weeks, but I think if I was... providing I'm ready... wow, my two children could both be born on the 23rd of the month! Robert would be exactly 22 months old if Squidge is born on 23rd September. I feel quite gobsmacked thinking that I could be giving birth a MONTH from tomorrow. When I found out I was pregnant, and due on 7th October, it never once crossed my mind that my baby could be a September baby. Robert came bang on time, but there was always the feeling that Squidge would be late.
I will be offered a sweep at 37 weeks, which would be my preferred method of induction if it works alone.
A week ago I felt a little depressed, and annoyed whenever anyone said to me "not long to go now" - for the record, I am NEVER saying that to a pregnant woman ever again unless she is in labour!!! Even if they only have 1 week to go, or a few days to go, or overdue! I now am feeling quite upbeat. I think the knowledge that if I want to I will be induced at 38 weeks has made a world of difference. It's like I know that if I get really fed up or in pain, or whatever, and I do just think "lets get the baby out" I will be able to at 38 weeks, and in fact they WANT me to. Even though at the moment I want to say no unless I am ready, if I change my mind I know my option is there, and that is just a nice comforting feeling I know from a completely selfish point of view but there we go!
Anyway so that's my situation!!
This weekend we went to Kent to see my family. I saw my brother and sister-in-law with my nephew Ewan as well which was lovely. The two boys got on better together than they did in November, but there were some sharing issues lol. Squidge and I got a lot of attention, particularly today at my Dad's party with a lot of people around. The boys got a lot of attention too, and there were so many people around it was hard to stay with Robert all the time, but there were always people around to stop anything from happening, and my step-mum's three nieces and nephews who are 13 and 14 were eager to play with both boys and keep them entertained, so I felt ok to sit and relax a bit.
Robert has had a bit of trouble with his routine this weekend with regards to nap and sleep, which resulted in a VERY grumpy and tearful little boy on Saturday night, who cried when he had to say goodbye to his Nanna, and who cried when he saw his other grandad and grandma, didn't want his teeth brushed, or his story read, or even milky, and just wanted to play with cars and threw a major tantrum and even when we put him to bed, we could hear him sobbing and calling out "car car!" He finally fell asleep but then he woke up half an hour earlier than normal the next morning, and getting him down for a nap at the normalish time (in an attempt to get his routine back on track) was a pain! But he slept then for a good amount of time, and once he was in the bath tonight before we set out for home, he was fine (although being persuaded to part from his teenage entertainers and supply of toy cars was a challenge!), and he fell asleep in the car home, and stayed sleepy after waking up when we arrived home, so he's fast asleep in his cot so here's hoping for a return to routine and a nice long sleep tonight!
Squidge is still nice and active, I get mainly wriggles and feet/elbows/hands brushing about, less kicks but when I do get a kick, they sometimes take my breath away and HURT! I love laying down and seeing Squidge wriggle about in there. I find it very comforting, and each day that passes my love and eagerness to meet Squidge grows.
There is always the feeling I think when you become pregnant with your second child, about how much you will be able to love them, how could you ever love your second child like you love your first. As the days and weeks go by, I just KNOW I will fall in love the second I see Squidge. I can't wait to call Squidge by his/her name (Boy's name STILL not decided, it probably won't be Christopher anymore but I really don't know!!!). I still have the feeling that Squidge is a girl, but tonight when I was making some tea, I don't know why but I suddenly imagined Squidge here, as a boy, and thinking "wow, a mum of 2 boys!" and that thought left a warm soft feeling inside me like I just know that even if Squidge isn't a girl like my instincts are telling me, that I will love my two boys so much, I will love BEING a mum to two boys! And strangely enough it felt at that moment "more right" if Squidge is a boy. Such an odd odd feeling but I just know that everything will be alright. My little Squidge... maybe connecting to the idea of having a boy will make it easier to find a name I like for a boy.
For now... we shall wait and see. I might only have another 4 weeks and 4 days to go of this pregnancy! It seems like such a short time now, and it really won't be long before I am beginning my next chapter, as a mum of TWO children!
Wednesday, 28 July 2010
29 weeks 6 days
Well I'm now on insulin for my diabetes, hurrah. Although I am tempted to see what happens at breakfast tomorrow and then maybe start Friday morning on it. I've also had to have my 28 week bloods done again this morning, because they couldn't find the results from when they supposedly did them at the same time as my GTT.
I can't believe how different Squidge's pregnancy is than his/her brother's. Not only because of the diabetes but also how my heartburn is less than with Robert's (so far), I've had a few niggles with it, and had to take gaviscon a couple of times, but by August 2008 it was bad enough that I had to get a prescription and from then on was taking it regularly, bearing in mind it's almost August now and I'm 7 weeks furthur on than I was with Robert at that time of the year. Maybe it will get worse, who knows?
But also, Squidge is constantly on the move, constantly squirming, waving arms/legs/head around. Beverley said Squidge was breech when I saw her on Monday. Although she seemed a little uncertain. Sometimes I think she's right and others I don't, I think Squidge must be having fun doing somersaults all the time in there! When she checked the position prior to checking the heartbeat, she must have woke Squidge up, who then went crazy! She had just asked me about Squidge's movements, and I said they were fine, then "ah, there we go!" and sure enough Squidge was wriggling, squirming, kicking around so much while Beverley was trying to get the heartbeat I was actually wondering if she'd manage to check it ok!! Robert was never like that, he was pretty chilled out during antenatal checks, occasionally gave a boot to the doppler, but then that was it!
The last two times she's actually felt Squidge move herself, so much so she put in my notes "FM - Good" (fetal movement) whereas before, and with Robert it was simply "FM" or "FMF" (fetal movement felt).
Does make me wonder if I'm going to have my hands full with Squidge, s/he is always on the move it seems. Of course having plenty of sleep times, but awake times - boy, I sure do know about it!!! Part of me is wondering if that's where all my energy is going - to Squidge!!! As s/he seems to have tonnes of it and I'm just SO. TIRED. all the time lately. Every day I wake up and wish I could have more sleep. Every day I have to nap with Robert. And then I'm itching to go to bed at barely 9pm every night, sometimes even at 8, 8.30. But then another thing it could be is the diabetes. Or maybe I'm anaemic this time, I guess I'll find out at my next midwife appointment on the 9th August. It would just be my luck I suppose to be anaemic as well, and have to take iron tablets.
Anyway, 30 weeks tomorrow. I can hardly believe it. 10 weeks from now I am due to be cuddling a second tiny baby which seems just crazy. And still a little surreal to be honest. I remember feeling the same with Robert, finding it difficult to imagine the reality that I am actually growing a BABY and that it won't really be long until it's here, with us, as a part of our family. I do actually also wonder if activity in the womb has a bearing on when they're likely to be born, will the fact that Squidge is ultra active mean s/he is born at an earlier gestation than Robert? Probably not I'm sure there are plenty of people who can disprove this with their babies.
Anyway I shall leave you with a few recent photos of my gorgeous boy (who's getting more and more grown up by the day!)
Robert's "grin" face :)
Peeking out of a bird hide at a country park, he was looking at some ducks on the lake.
Eating his dinner. We put out a fork every meal or a spoon depending on the meal, and we encourage him to use it but we don't put pressure on him, I'm sure he'll use it all the time when he's ready!
Playing with the goats at a local kiddie farm, they are allowed to go in the pens as long as they don't chase the goats!
Picking strawberries at Grandma's house, he loved this!
Sitting at his table, he loves to sit here and colour, or read books, or eat his snack and lunch. I've started to give him his sandwich at his table, and it's going pretty well although he often has a lot of half eaten bits of sandwich on the plate at the end! I ask him to sit back down if he's eating and only let him wander off if he's finished (which he now signs to me by the way!)
Enjoying the see-saw :)
Bath time fun :) This is his "mischeivous" look he gets, at this point he was sliding himself up and down the bath mat while holding on to the railings!
Caterpillar! Fascinated by it, he also found one today, but then after he put it down, he stepped on it and killed it :(
Coming to touch the baby ;) He doesn't really understand it I don't think, I guess it is a pretty tough concept for him to get.
And lastly, this photo: Goodness knows what provoked this expression, I have a feeling it was just one of those amazing captures from just a variety of expressions if you know what I mean!
I can't believe how different Squidge's pregnancy is than his/her brother's. Not only because of the diabetes but also how my heartburn is less than with Robert's (so far), I've had a few niggles with it, and had to take gaviscon a couple of times, but by August 2008 it was bad enough that I had to get a prescription and from then on was taking it regularly, bearing in mind it's almost August now and I'm 7 weeks furthur on than I was with Robert at that time of the year. Maybe it will get worse, who knows?
But also, Squidge is constantly on the move, constantly squirming, waving arms/legs/head around. Beverley said Squidge was breech when I saw her on Monday. Although she seemed a little uncertain. Sometimes I think she's right and others I don't, I think Squidge must be having fun doing somersaults all the time in there! When she checked the position prior to checking the heartbeat, she must have woke Squidge up, who then went crazy! She had just asked me about Squidge's movements, and I said they were fine, then "ah, there we go!" and sure enough Squidge was wriggling, squirming, kicking around so much while Beverley was trying to get the heartbeat I was actually wondering if she'd manage to check it ok!! Robert was never like that, he was pretty chilled out during antenatal checks, occasionally gave a boot to the doppler, but then that was it!
The last two times she's actually felt Squidge move herself, so much so she put in my notes "FM - Good" (fetal movement) whereas before, and with Robert it was simply "FM" or "FMF" (fetal movement felt).
Does make me wonder if I'm going to have my hands full with Squidge, s/he is always on the move it seems. Of course having plenty of sleep times, but awake times - boy, I sure do know about it!!! Part of me is wondering if that's where all my energy is going - to Squidge!!! As s/he seems to have tonnes of it and I'm just SO. TIRED. all the time lately. Every day I wake up and wish I could have more sleep. Every day I have to nap with Robert. And then I'm itching to go to bed at barely 9pm every night, sometimes even at 8, 8.30. But then another thing it could be is the diabetes. Or maybe I'm anaemic this time, I guess I'll find out at my next midwife appointment on the 9th August. It would just be my luck I suppose to be anaemic as well, and have to take iron tablets.
Anyway, 30 weeks tomorrow. I can hardly believe it. 10 weeks from now I am due to be cuddling a second tiny baby which seems just crazy. And still a little surreal to be honest. I remember feeling the same with Robert, finding it difficult to imagine the reality that I am actually growing a BABY and that it won't really be long until it's here, with us, as a part of our family. I do actually also wonder if activity in the womb has a bearing on when they're likely to be born, will the fact that Squidge is ultra active mean s/he is born at an earlier gestation than Robert? Probably not I'm sure there are plenty of people who can disprove this with their babies.
Anyway I shall leave you with a few recent photos of my gorgeous boy (who's getting more and more grown up by the day!)
Robert's "grin" face :)
Peeking out of a bird hide at a country park, he was looking at some ducks on the lake.
Eating his dinner. We put out a fork every meal or a spoon depending on the meal, and we encourage him to use it but we don't put pressure on him, I'm sure he'll use it all the time when he's ready!
Playing with the goats at a local kiddie farm, they are allowed to go in the pens as long as they don't chase the goats!
Picking strawberries at Grandma's house, he loved this!
Sitting at his table, he loves to sit here and colour, or read books, or eat his snack and lunch. I've started to give him his sandwich at his table, and it's going pretty well although he often has a lot of half eaten bits of sandwich on the plate at the end! I ask him to sit back down if he's eating and only let him wander off if he's finished (which he now signs to me by the way!)
Enjoying the see-saw :)
Bath time fun :) This is his "mischeivous" look he gets, at this point he was sliding himself up and down the bath mat while holding on to the railings!
Caterpillar! Fascinated by it, he also found one today, but then after he put it down, he stepped on it and killed it :(
Coming to touch the baby ;) He doesn't really understand it I don't think, I guess it is a pretty tough concept for him to get.
And lastly, this photo: Goodness knows what provoked this expression, I have a feeling it was just one of those amazing captures from just a variety of expressions if you know what I mean!
Tuesday, 13 July 2010
27 weeks 5 days - mothers instincts? Name spoiler finally!!
I don't know if it's because of the several dreams I have had now, but I can't help but think of Squidge as a little girl. Last night I was laying in bed, Squidge was being overly active, which was lovely and I was just watching my belly wobble around, feeling the little pokes wriggles and (for the first time this pregnancy!!) hiccups! I lay there looking fondly at my bump and allowing myself to daydream about little Erin (yes I finally succumbed, there you go!! That's our girl's name!!) joining us in October, signing cards from Nicola, Jonathan, Robert and Erin. I couldn't help but keep thinking about that name. And then I felt guilty, because what if it's Christopher and not Erin? Christopher still doesn't sit perfectly well in my mind and heart. Whether it's because I don't believe the baby is a boy deep down, or because I am thinking it's a girl because we both like the name Erin so much, I don't know.
I so want to tell myself that it's a boy. I just know so many people who are having girls and only a couple who are having boys so I just feel that for that reason I'll have another boy because then it'll be more even. I know it doesn't work like that but I can't help but think it. I'm actually terrified that by allowing myself to whole heartedly believe that the baby is a girl, that by thinking "Erin" automatically when I look at my bump, and feel the baby move, that I'm setting myself up for huge disappointment when I find out that I'm not having my Erin afterall. I can't believe what started out as a small niggly feeling in the back of my mind has now turned into such an overpowering feeling it's completely overriden my "boy" thoughts completely.
I keep thinking about the growth scans I am likely to get. Keep thinking "there's still that chance to find out". And I still think that although the urge gets stronger every day to find out the sex, will I be hugely disappointed that I caved in and disallowed myself the surprise? Part of me is looking forward to the surprise at the birth so much, but part of me now, with these overwhelming "it's a girl" thoughts is getting me scared that I will not accept a boy so lovingly in my mind if it's a surprise, especially since I have a leaning towards wanting a girl this time.
Every time I hear about someone who's found out they're having a girl, I inwardly groan, like it makes it less likely that I'm having one! How crazy is that?! I know that at the end of the day I will love my tiny baby boy just as much as if he were a girl, because I thought the same with Robert, I wanted him to be a girl, he wasn't, but I love him so much and wouldn't make him a girl for the world now! Wouldn't change a thing about him. He makes me so proud every day.
Anyway that's enough rambling about that. Tomorrow I will be having my 28 week midwife appointment, she will let me know the results of the glucose tolerance test I had yesterday, and do all the routine checks, and I'll talk to her about my birthing worries and my dreams and see what she says about that. I've not heard back from the community midwife office yet regarding my debrief on Robert's birth so I'll see what happens tomorrow.
I so want to tell myself that it's a boy. I just know so many people who are having girls and only a couple who are having boys so I just feel that for that reason I'll have another boy because then it'll be more even. I know it doesn't work like that but I can't help but think it. I'm actually terrified that by allowing myself to whole heartedly believe that the baby is a girl, that by thinking "Erin" automatically when I look at my bump, and feel the baby move, that I'm setting myself up for huge disappointment when I find out that I'm not having my Erin afterall. I can't believe what started out as a small niggly feeling in the back of my mind has now turned into such an overpowering feeling it's completely overriden my "boy" thoughts completely.
I keep thinking about the growth scans I am likely to get. Keep thinking "there's still that chance to find out". And I still think that although the urge gets stronger every day to find out the sex, will I be hugely disappointed that I caved in and disallowed myself the surprise? Part of me is looking forward to the surprise at the birth so much, but part of me now, with these overwhelming "it's a girl" thoughts is getting me scared that I will not accept a boy so lovingly in my mind if it's a surprise, especially since I have a leaning towards wanting a girl this time.
Every time I hear about someone who's found out they're having a girl, I inwardly groan, like it makes it less likely that I'm having one! How crazy is that?! I know that at the end of the day I will love my tiny baby boy just as much as if he were a girl, because I thought the same with Robert, I wanted him to be a girl, he wasn't, but I love him so much and wouldn't make him a girl for the world now! Wouldn't change a thing about him. He makes me so proud every day.
Anyway that's enough rambling about that. Tomorrow I will be having my 28 week midwife appointment, she will let me know the results of the glucose tolerance test I had yesterday, and do all the routine checks, and I'll talk to her about my birthing worries and my dreams and see what she says about that. I've not heard back from the community midwife office yet regarding my debrief on Robert's birth so I'll see what happens tomorrow.
Tuesday, 6 July 2010
26 weeks 5 days - random things
Firstly, I think Robert is in the middle of weaning himself :( He is usually most eager in the mornings, but lately, all he wants to do is immediately climb off the bed and go and play, no snuggle time for mummy and daddy at all :( He will occasionally come up to me afterwards and have some milk briefly, but it's never for very long anymore. And at night before bed he seems to sign milk very happily, but as soon as I lay down on the bed he goes to climb off, so more often than not lately he's been going to bed without having any milk at all. And I can't remember the last time he asked in the middle of the day. I still have 3 months to go of this pregnancy and it seems very likely he will have completely self weaned within a month, so by the time he's 20 months old. But if it is to be, it is to be. I'd much rather he wean himself slowly like he is doing than to suddenly stop. I think I will ask Jonathan to take some pictures the next time Robert has some milk, as it may be the last breastfeeding picture of Robert I have! I do so love the ones I have of him when he is younger, the last one we have is of him around 10 months old. So almost half his life ago!
Another thing is that the closer to the end of pregnancy I get (I know, I'm not even 3/4 of the way through yet!) the more I worry about a repeat performance of Robert's birth. Or perhaps not a repeat performance, but that worrying about Robert's birth will make me "clam up" during birth and make it harder on me. I have had some rather horrific dreams of late, one of which was only a couple of nights ago, I was in labour, and baby was in trouble, got itself into a strange position in the womb (its head was sticking OUT of my belly, so you could see its face and everything!). The midwife although they were around, was not with me and I couldn't find her. I could sense that in my dream I was tense and while I don't remember any pain I remember the stalling of labour and when finally the baby was born he (yes he) was in so much trouble breathing that I couldn't do anything for him and he died. :(
That is probably one of the greatest fears regarding Robert's birth. Both Jonathan and I were in so much shock when Robert was born that he wasn't breathing, and was blue/black all over, that if the midwives hadn't been around, he would have died. In fact, Jonathan told me that when Robert was born, he thought that Robert was already dead.
I read in the pregnancy book that came with the bounty pack I got at 8 weeks from the midwife a section on postnatal post traumatic stress disorder. When I read that section I thought "that's what I had". Symptoms including numbness to emotion, irritability, irrationality, depression. Caused by a fear of death either of yourself or your baby. While the anti-depressants I was on helped with the PND I suffered, I think there is some more work I need to do on Robert's birth and my worries surrounding this.
I still remember the numbness I felt after he was born. I remember sitting on the sofa numbly (fully naked but not caring!!!), watching them with Robert as they fought to get him breathing, I remember going into the ambulance, sitting on the seat in there and the midwife telling me it was ok to cry but I couldn't cry. I remember seeing him in the incubator for the first time after I'd had my stitches done and had a bath, and feeling nothing towards him. A day later I was able to cry. A few weeks after Robert was born, I was able to think back to the birth without immediately bursting into tears, but I then did sort of block it from my mind.
Now, with Squidge's birth getting closer and closer I can't help but think about Robert's again and I do have tears in my eyes right now thinking about it. I think it will be necessary to get some help in overcoming my blocked feelings towards his birth, it was probably something I should have done a long time ago but I am beginning to realise now that it is something that needs to be done, and when I see my midwife again in a week's time, I shall talk to her about it and see what she can suggest. I need to do something. For me. For Squidge, and for Robert too.
EDIT: Additional thoughts on the dreams since I first posted this entry.
The one I said above was only one half. The next half of the dream, I can't remember if it was a second one after having woken briefly and fallen asleep again, or if it followed on, but I was in labour again with a different baby. I remember the 2nd labour stalling again, as I was nervous due to the other birth, but after a while I sort of "swallowed" it, and just tried to put it out of my mind, and did what I thought I should. Again, there was no midwife around (although again, there was supposed to be one near), and I again birthed alone, bending down to receive the baby myself. The baby was ok, and I was so relieved, yet my feelings still seemed a little squashed. This baby, while looking practically identical to the baby boy who died, and was a similar weight (BIG!), was a baby girl.
I found myself wondering, if the first birth in the sequence was meant to represent Robert's birth, the baby who would have died if no midwives were around. And if maybe, some glimmer of hope, that the second birth, is meant to represent Squidge's birth, that while I still have some risidual feelings left over from the first birth, I manage to squash them, and successfully birth a healthy baby (GIRL????!!!) who even with lack of immediate midwife care would be alright?
I think I would still need to talk to someone, try and get these issues I have surrounding Robert's birth out in the open, but if the second half of the dream is a vision of Squidge's birth, maybe I should try and remain positive.
Another thing is that the closer to the end of pregnancy I get (I know, I'm not even 3/4 of the way through yet!) the more I worry about a repeat performance of Robert's birth. Or perhaps not a repeat performance, but that worrying about Robert's birth will make me "clam up" during birth and make it harder on me. I have had some rather horrific dreams of late, one of which was only a couple of nights ago, I was in labour, and baby was in trouble, got itself into a strange position in the womb (its head was sticking OUT of my belly, so you could see its face and everything!). The midwife although they were around, was not with me and I couldn't find her. I could sense that in my dream I was tense and while I don't remember any pain I remember the stalling of labour and when finally the baby was born he (yes he) was in so much trouble breathing that I couldn't do anything for him and he died. :(
That is probably one of the greatest fears regarding Robert's birth. Both Jonathan and I were in so much shock when Robert was born that he wasn't breathing, and was blue/black all over, that if the midwives hadn't been around, he would have died. In fact, Jonathan told me that when Robert was born, he thought that Robert was already dead.
I read in the pregnancy book that came with the bounty pack I got at 8 weeks from the midwife a section on postnatal post traumatic stress disorder. When I read that section I thought "that's what I had". Symptoms including numbness to emotion, irritability, irrationality, depression. Caused by a fear of death either of yourself or your baby. While the anti-depressants I was on helped with the PND I suffered, I think there is some more work I need to do on Robert's birth and my worries surrounding this.
I still remember the numbness I felt after he was born. I remember sitting on the sofa numbly (fully naked but not caring!!!), watching them with Robert as they fought to get him breathing, I remember going into the ambulance, sitting on the seat in there and the midwife telling me it was ok to cry but I couldn't cry. I remember seeing him in the incubator for the first time after I'd had my stitches done and had a bath, and feeling nothing towards him. A day later I was able to cry. A few weeks after Robert was born, I was able to think back to the birth without immediately bursting into tears, but I then did sort of block it from my mind.
Now, with Squidge's birth getting closer and closer I can't help but think about Robert's again and I do have tears in my eyes right now thinking about it. I think it will be necessary to get some help in overcoming my blocked feelings towards his birth, it was probably something I should have done a long time ago but I am beginning to realise now that it is something that needs to be done, and when I see my midwife again in a week's time, I shall talk to her about it and see what she can suggest. I need to do something. For me. For Squidge, and for Robert too.
EDIT: Additional thoughts on the dreams since I first posted this entry.
The one I said above was only one half. The next half of the dream, I can't remember if it was a second one after having woken briefly and fallen asleep again, or if it followed on, but I was in labour again with a different baby. I remember the 2nd labour stalling again, as I was nervous due to the other birth, but after a while I sort of "swallowed" it, and just tried to put it out of my mind, and did what I thought I should. Again, there was no midwife around (although again, there was supposed to be one near), and I again birthed alone, bending down to receive the baby myself. The baby was ok, and I was so relieved, yet my feelings still seemed a little squashed. This baby, while looking practically identical to the baby boy who died, and was a similar weight (BIG!), was a baby girl.
I found myself wondering, if the first birth in the sequence was meant to represent Robert's birth, the baby who would have died if no midwives were around. And if maybe, some glimmer of hope, that the second birth, is meant to represent Squidge's birth, that while I still have some risidual feelings left over from the first birth, I manage to squash them, and successfully birth a healthy baby (GIRL????!!!) who even with lack of immediate midwife care would be alright?
I think I would still need to talk to someone, try and get these issues I have surrounding Robert's birth out in the open, but if the second half of the dream is a vision of Squidge's birth, maybe I should try and remain positive.
Tuesday, 22 June 2010
24 weeks 5 days - update on my little monsters!
Well I'm back from holiday as you probably know. I will update about the holiday in another post, as only the first day's photos of the holiday have been sorted out and I would like to just put it all in together.
The holiday must have done Robert some good for his development, since we've been away, he has turned into such a little chatterbox! Still not many words or sentences of any kind, but his chattering has become a lot more conversational, AND he has added many more words to his vocabulary, and is using existing ones a lot more! He now says (of the top of my head) car, chair, again, blue, peas, spoon, erm... argh having a mental block.. there are at least a handful more words he's said but I can't remember them right now! Car is by far his most used word. If he sees a car go past, he exclaims "Car!" if he sees a parked car, "Car!" if he's playing with cars, "Car!" hahaha! He's also trying to count, he just says "da" but he gets the counting tone just right while he's doing it with the voice going higher at the end! Hehehe!
He will be 19 months old tomorrow. He is growing up so fast, it's almost like if I blink he will suddenly be 18 and going off to uni or getting a job or something! Some days I look at him and think "wow, he is getting so BIG" and when I see him with other children I think he does look big compared to them. And then other times I look at him (usually when he's standing next to Jonathan, where he barely seems to be a third of Jonathan's height) and he looks tiny, my little sweet boy!
I do feel guilty sometimes, if I have a bad day where Robert is being particularly demanding (I wouldn't say naughty, just inquisitive, or testing boundaries) and I've found him hard to deal with, I moan on my facebook a lot. And reading back, it does sound like I am so ungrateful for him, that I don't enjoy being a mum at all. Which isn't the case, I love him to bits, but of course sometimes I guess it doesn't come off like that, and I hate that people might think I don't love my son, so I'm trying so hard not to sound off on facebook regarding Robert. If I have a hard day for other reasons I will put it on there. I guess it's just one of those things you have to think twice about!
With regards to Squidge, well I saw the midwife yesterday afternoon. She took my blood pressure (110/65) and tested my urine which was clear, then she measured me, and Squidge is measuring a whopping 28cm! I thought she only measured me at 28 weeks with Robert but maybe she wanted to measure me earlier due to his size, or maybe I'm mis-remembering. She then told me that she wanted me to get a glucose tolerance test to check for gestational diabetes if I was happy to do that, and she also said she'd like me to see a consultant. She basically explained that as I was thinking about a home birth they want to take as much precaution as possible to make sure that what happened with Robert doesn't happen again, so if Squidge is as big or bigger than Robert, we'll have to discuss things with the consultant and see where we go. I know I'm not a medical expert, but from the way Robert's body was born immediately when I stood up and pushed, that implies to me that it wasn't shoulder dystocia but rather bad positioning previously especially considering Robert's size.
But either way she made it clear to me that it would be very much a two sided conversation, and my opinions and feelings would be considered, and that if I decided to go ahead with the home birth that I would be supported in this decision. I told her that I hadn't 100% decided on a home birth, that I am keeping an open mind and will see what happens, but also that I expected the same from my care givers, that they would keep an open mind for me as well. I think that seeing that I wasn't just steadfastedly demanding that I have a home birth no matter what, that I was considering the views of her and that I would consider what the consultant said, has made her more open to me and my wants, which is good.
I'm pleased in a way that I am getting the GTT and seeing the consultant, because it shows they are going out of their way to try and make things easier on me, and while it still seems to me that I have a fairly uncomplicated pregnancy at the moment, it does give me comfort that I'm not just being left to my own devices like I was with Robert. If that makes sense!
Anyway! Squidge is really quite the wriggler. Last night as I laid down, he started squirming SO much it felt like arms and legs were poking out all over, if the light hadn't been off it would have been quite some viewing! lol! Sometimes when I feel Squidge move or kick it's sort of easy to imagine how someone COULD put them off as wind, or muscle twitches, or whatever. But I was laying down and feeling Squidge fight his way through my skin almost last night and wondered how anyone could possibly feel something like that and not know they were pregnant!
With Robert I commented on his 24 week bump picture as him being such a wriggler, and then on the 28 week one I said I don't know how I thought he was so active back then as he got so much more active since then! So god knows what Squidge'll be like in another 4 weeks! And will Squidge be measuring 4 weeks ahead still when I next see the midwife! I will be updating the belly gallery soon, I took some when I was 24+1 in Cornwall so when I get the photos I'll be adding them! :)
Anyway, I have a lot of sorting out, tidying, cleaning, unpacking to be getting on with, possibly another load of washing from the holiday to get in the machine. I want to rearrange the living room! I want more room!!! Arghh! I want next door to put their house up for sale so we can buy it and knock it into one big giant super house! haha! But it's unlikely as it's rented out :( Anyway, that's all for now, hope you all had a great week!
The holiday must have done Robert some good for his development, since we've been away, he has turned into such a little chatterbox! Still not many words or sentences of any kind, but his chattering has become a lot more conversational, AND he has added many more words to his vocabulary, and is using existing ones a lot more! He now says (of the top of my head) car, chair, again, blue, peas, spoon, erm... argh having a mental block.. there are at least a handful more words he's said but I can't remember them right now! Car is by far his most used word. If he sees a car go past, he exclaims "Car!" if he sees a parked car, "Car!" if he's playing with cars, "Car!" hahaha! He's also trying to count, he just says "da" but he gets the counting tone just right while he's doing it with the voice going higher at the end! Hehehe!
He will be 19 months old tomorrow. He is growing up so fast, it's almost like if I blink he will suddenly be 18 and going off to uni or getting a job or something! Some days I look at him and think "wow, he is getting so BIG" and when I see him with other children I think he does look big compared to them. And then other times I look at him (usually when he's standing next to Jonathan, where he barely seems to be a third of Jonathan's height) and he looks tiny, my little sweet boy!
I do feel guilty sometimes, if I have a bad day where Robert is being particularly demanding (I wouldn't say naughty, just inquisitive, or testing boundaries) and I've found him hard to deal with, I moan on my facebook a lot. And reading back, it does sound like I am so ungrateful for him, that I don't enjoy being a mum at all. Which isn't the case, I love him to bits, but of course sometimes I guess it doesn't come off like that, and I hate that people might think I don't love my son, so I'm trying so hard not to sound off on facebook regarding Robert. If I have a hard day for other reasons I will put it on there. I guess it's just one of those things you have to think twice about!
With regards to Squidge, well I saw the midwife yesterday afternoon. She took my blood pressure (110/65) and tested my urine which was clear, then she measured me, and Squidge is measuring a whopping 28cm! I thought she only measured me at 28 weeks with Robert but maybe she wanted to measure me earlier due to his size, or maybe I'm mis-remembering. She then told me that she wanted me to get a glucose tolerance test to check for gestational diabetes if I was happy to do that, and she also said she'd like me to see a consultant. She basically explained that as I was thinking about a home birth they want to take as much precaution as possible to make sure that what happened with Robert doesn't happen again, so if Squidge is as big or bigger than Robert, we'll have to discuss things with the consultant and see where we go. I know I'm not a medical expert, but from the way Robert's body was born immediately when I stood up and pushed, that implies to me that it wasn't shoulder dystocia but rather bad positioning previously especially considering Robert's size.
But either way she made it clear to me that it would be very much a two sided conversation, and my opinions and feelings would be considered, and that if I decided to go ahead with the home birth that I would be supported in this decision. I told her that I hadn't 100% decided on a home birth, that I am keeping an open mind and will see what happens, but also that I expected the same from my care givers, that they would keep an open mind for me as well. I think that seeing that I wasn't just steadfastedly demanding that I have a home birth no matter what, that I was considering the views of her and that I would consider what the consultant said, has made her more open to me and my wants, which is good.
I'm pleased in a way that I am getting the GTT and seeing the consultant, because it shows they are going out of their way to try and make things easier on me, and while it still seems to me that I have a fairly uncomplicated pregnancy at the moment, it does give me comfort that I'm not just being left to my own devices like I was with Robert. If that makes sense!
Anyway! Squidge is really quite the wriggler. Last night as I laid down, he started squirming SO much it felt like arms and legs were poking out all over, if the light hadn't been off it would have been quite some viewing! lol! Sometimes when I feel Squidge move or kick it's sort of easy to imagine how someone COULD put them off as wind, or muscle twitches, or whatever. But I was laying down and feeling Squidge fight his way through my skin almost last night and wondered how anyone could possibly feel something like that and not know they were pregnant!
With Robert I commented on his 24 week bump picture as him being such a wriggler, and then on the 28 week one I said I don't know how I thought he was so active back then as he got so much more active since then! So god knows what Squidge'll be like in another 4 weeks! And will Squidge be measuring 4 weeks ahead still when I next see the midwife! I will be updating the belly gallery soon, I took some when I was 24+1 in Cornwall so when I get the photos I'll be adding them! :)
Anyway, I have a lot of sorting out, tidying, cleaning, unpacking to be getting on with, possibly another load of washing from the holiday to get in the machine. I want to rearrange the living room! I want more room!!! Arghh! I want next door to put their house up for sale so we can buy it and knock it into one big giant super house! haha! But it's unlikely as it's rented out :( Anyway, that's all for now, hope you all had a great week!
Thursday, 10 June 2010
23 weeks - updates.
Well I wanted to do a pregnancy update today, but also a mini Robert update plus photos. I am supposed to be sorting out clean washing and putting about 3 loads away but oh well, shhhh don't tell Jonathan lol ;)
I know compared to some people, my two pregnancies so far have been very close together, but I am still having trouble remembering aspects of Robert's pregnancy. Specifically just how active he was. I remember saying that he was soooo active, but him being my first I had no benchmark to set it against! Plus I suspect his placenta was at the front, whereas Squidge's is at the back, perfectly positioned.
Squidge is SUCH an active baby so far. I think I will only be able to compare him to Robert when I am furthur along, but for now, I think he is definitely far more active than I remember Robert being at this stage. Yesterday I think I felt no less than 7 or 8 kicking SESSIONS where he would also do flips around in my belly and poke his legs and arms about. I felt soft pokey/brushy sensations yesterday at one point right down by my pelvis which I think were his arms and hands. He definitely wakes up a bit when I lay down for bed, which I love because it's dark and still and quiet (and since I go to bed before Jonathan I get these movements and kicks all to myself!). I am currently feeling yet more kicks and wriggles. Development sites say that around now babies have a set awake/sleep patterns, and are asleep for over 90% of the time, maybe as much as 95% of the time, which just boggles me the amount I'm getting my insides booted around! It's nice at this stage because Squidge isn't quite big enough to be kicking uncomfortable places, unless he's in the position to be kicking my bladder! But I do so look forward to feeling even STRONGER kicks! I love watching my belly when he's particularly active and seeing my belly blip out! Given my size I do find it amazing how much I can feel with my hand, and see at this relatively early stage!
I am also in the early stages of heartburn again. It's not distractingly bad at the moment, but I do notice it when I get it, but it generally goes away by itself. I am using up my rennies I bought when pregnant with Robert, and will get a prescription when I next see the midwife for gaviscon (shudder) when they run out. I am also getting up generally at least twice in the night for a pee, which is a bit of a pain, combined with Jonathan's snoring, means I don't get as much sleep as I generally need.
Ahem, well I saved this entry at this point 4 days ago, and forgot all about it *blush* so I might as well finish it off! I changed the title, it said 22 weeks 3 days but I'm not 23 weeks exactly! Oopsy!
Anyway, Robert is gradually becoming a little chatterbox, he's constantly saying "stuff", mainly babbling but he has now started saying "car" again with a vengeance! He has added "chair" to his vocabulary, and re-added car which he hadn't said in a couple of months after he first said it! ;)
I'm pretty certain he is starting being able to distinguish colours and knows what we mean when we ask him for the "blue one" or the "red one". :)
We bought Robert new shoes from Clarks the other weekend. He was in a pair of size 4 trainers from matalan, and anyway, we took him, and he measured as a size 5.. ahem, oops! And he's actually in size 6 for growth room!!! Oh well! Anyway we decided to get him a pair of shoes and a pair of sandles, which set us back almost £60.. ouch! Anyway, he love love LOVES his sandles, which are these ones...
And we also got him a pair of normal shoes.. which are these ones...
Yesterday he looked around the lounge, spotted his shoes and picked them up, but kept looking around, and seemed to be getting more and more distressed. I figured he was looking for his sandles, which were upstairs, so I asked him if he was looking for his sandles, and he immediately looked less distressed. I told him they were upstairs and that I'd go and get them, and he immediately got up and ran to the stairs, so I went upstairs, brought them down. He grabbed them off me immediately, then as I sat down, he ran up to me, sat on my lap, and proceeded to open my hands and put the sandles in them! Then lifted his feet to try and get his feet in my hands! Hehe! Funny boy! So I put his sandles on and he was so pleased, and spent the next 5 minutes running backwards and forwards in the room ;)
I've got him a pair of crocs style sandles as well, as anyone on facebook can probably tell we're going on holiday next week (well, leaving this Saturday) so we thought we'd get him some sandles we don't mind getting ruined! We're going to north Cornwall, to the same town we went to for our 1 year "being together" anniversary, over 8 years ago now! Jonathan was going to propose to me there but I somehow managed to get him to propose 6 months earlier hahaha!
I am thoroughly looking forward to this holiday, we've not been on holiday since September 2006, which was 2 years before I was even pregnant with Robert!!! I am a little nervous about the sheer amount of things we will need (and just SO thankful we don't need to take our travel cot or highchair with us as the cottage will provide them!) and whether we will be able to fit it all in Jonathan's tiny 2 door Toyota Yaris! I've started packing already which I'm pleased about, Robert's things are mostly done we just need to get the last minute things like the plates and bowls, shampoo and bubble bath packed for him. Then the toys we'll want to take with us, plus some others for the journey, and our clothes and things too. Hopefully we won't need all three suitcases, but we'll need an extra bag for the toys!!! And then trying to squeeze in the pushchair! Still, at least we will be the last holiday with a small car, we're going to upgrade to a bigger car before Squidge is here.
I am surprised that none of my dreams have been related to Squidge as such, I've had no true baby dreams, or maybe one or two but ages ago! I still have no inkling as to Squidge's gender within me if you know what I mean, but I'm still maintaining that it's a boy. But to me there still feels like there's a 50/50 chance. I don't know if that makes any sense at all!
Anyway here are some photos of my little boy :)
Enjoying a toddler ride at Wicksteed :)
Lots of climbing frames and toddler playgrounds there! He really enjoyed it!
Playing with his train track in the garden! :)
Cuddling up with his bunny on the beanbag :)
Hello?
Enjoying bath time :)
Fast asleep cuddling his polar bear! He loves to snuggle up holding a cuddly toy when he sleeps, we found him fast asleep still at 8am a week ago or so, and Jonathan went in to take photos :)
Robert enjoying the nice weather in his paddling pool :)
And drinking the water... which had sun cream all in it where it had washed off Robert a little!! Nice!
Going down the slide all wet... shooting off the end and giving himself a slide phobia... argh!
Helping Mummy sweep the pebbles back up - really need to lay paving slabs there instead of those damned pebbles!!
Anyway that's about it!
If I don't update before, then I probably won't until the 20th at least, possibly 21st. I have my 24 (+4) week appointment on the 21st so will probably update then.
I'll try and get my 24 week photo taken on holiday if I remember! I think it's grown loads since 20 weeks already! I just love having a bump! Makes me feel just so much more attractive than when I'm just fat! (But still, once the bump goes, I'm definitely going to get rid of the fat!!!) I'm doing quite well lately on not gaining much weight, the last two weeks I've gained no weight at all to speak of, there's been less than 1lb fluctuation each week which I'm really pleased about, I don't particularly want to lose weight, I just don't want to gain much!! So despite gaining about a stone in 3-4 weeks previously I've tried to be sensible and so far it's working. Although I bet I'll have gained when I step on the scales after the holiday! lol! Right, back to business! Hope you have a great week and a half (or so!)
I know compared to some people, my two pregnancies so far have been very close together, but I am still having trouble remembering aspects of Robert's pregnancy. Specifically just how active he was. I remember saying that he was soooo active, but him being my first I had no benchmark to set it against! Plus I suspect his placenta was at the front, whereas Squidge's is at the back, perfectly positioned.
Squidge is SUCH an active baby so far. I think I will only be able to compare him to Robert when I am furthur along, but for now, I think he is definitely far more active than I remember Robert being at this stage. Yesterday I think I felt no less than 7 or 8 kicking SESSIONS where he would also do flips around in my belly and poke his legs and arms about. I felt soft pokey/brushy sensations yesterday at one point right down by my pelvis which I think were his arms and hands. He definitely wakes up a bit when I lay down for bed, which I love because it's dark and still and quiet (and since I go to bed before Jonathan I get these movements and kicks all to myself!). I am currently feeling yet more kicks and wriggles. Development sites say that around now babies have a set awake/sleep patterns, and are asleep for over 90% of the time, maybe as much as 95% of the time, which just boggles me the amount I'm getting my insides booted around! It's nice at this stage because Squidge isn't quite big enough to be kicking uncomfortable places, unless he's in the position to be kicking my bladder! But I do so look forward to feeling even STRONGER kicks! I love watching my belly when he's particularly active and seeing my belly blip out! Given my size I do find it amazing how much I can feel with my hand, and see at this relatively early stage!
I am also in the early stages of heartburn again. It's not distractingly bad at the moment, but I do notice it when I get it, but it generally goes away by itself. I am using up my rennies I bought when pregnant with Robert, and will get a prescription when I next see the midwife for gaviscon (shudder) when they run out. I am also getting up generally at least twice in the night for a pee, which is a bit of a pain, combined with Jonathan's snoring, means I don't get as much sleep as I generally need.
Ahem, well I saved this entry at this point 4 days ago, and forgot all about it *blush* so I might as well finish it off! I changed the title, it said 22 weeks 3 days but I'm not 23 weeks exactly! Oopsy!
Anyway, Robert is gradually becoming a little chatterbox, he's constantly saying "stuff", mainly babbling but he has now started saying "car" again with a vengeance! He has added "chair" to his vocabulary, and re-added car which he hadn't said in a couple of months after he first said it! ;)
I'm pretty certain he is starting being able to distinguish colours and knows what we mean when we ask him for the "blue one" or the "red one". :)
We bought Robert new shoes from Clarks the other weekend. He was in a pair of size 4 trainers from matalan, and anyway, we took him, and he measured as a size 5.. ahem, oops! And he's actually in size 6 for growth room!!! Oh well! Anyway we decided to get him a pair of shoes and a pair of sandles, which set us back almost £60.. ouch! Anyway, he love love LOVES his sandles, which are these ones...
And we also got him a pair of normal shoes.. which are these ones...
Yesterday he looked around the lounge, spotted his shoes and picked them up, but kept looking around, and seemed to be getting more and more distressed. I figured he was looking for his sandles, which were upstairs, so I asked him if he was looking for his sandles, and he immediately looked less distressed. I told him they were upstairs and that I'd go and get them, and he immediately got up and ran to the stairs, so I went upstairs, brought them down. He grabbed them off me immediately, then as I sat down, he ran up to me, sat on my lap, and proceeded to open my hands and put the sandles in them! Then lifted his feet to try and get his feet in my hands! Hehe! Funny boy! So I put his sandles on and he was so pleased, and spent the next 5 minutes running backwards and forwards in the room ;)
I've got him a pair of crocs style sandles as well, as anyone on facebook can probably tell we're going on holiday next week (well, leaving this Saturday) so we thought we'd get him some sandles we don't mind getting ruined! We're going to north Cornwall, to the same town we went to for our 1 year "being together" anniversary, over 8 years ago now! Jonathan was going to propose to me there but I somehow managed to get him to propose 6 months earlier hahaha!
I am thoroughly looking forward to this holiday, we've not been on holiday since September 2006, which was 2 years before I was even pregnant with Robert!!! I am a little nervous about the sheer amount of things we will need (and just SO thankful we don't need to take our travel cot or highchair with us as the cottage will provide them!) and whether we will be able to fit it all in Jonathan's tiny 2 door Toyota Yaris! I've started packing already which I'm pleased about, Robert's things are mostly done we just need to get the last minute things like the plates and bowls, shampoo and bubble bath packed for him. Then the toys we'll want to take with us, plus some others for the journey, and our clothes and things too. Hopefully we won't need all three suitcases, but we'll need an extra bag for the toys!!! And then trying to squeeze in the pushchair! Still, at least we will be the last holiday with a small car, we're going to upgrade to a bigger car before Squidge is here.
I am surprised that none of my dreams have been related to Squidge as such, I've had no true baby dreams, or maybe one or two but ages ago! I still have no inkling as to Squidge's gender within me if you know what I mean, but I'm still maintaining that it's a boy. But to me there still feels like there's a 50/50 chance. I don't know if that makes any sense at all!
Anyway here are some photos of my little boy :)
Enjoying a toddler ride at Wicksteed :)
Lots of climbing frames and toddler playgrounds there! He really enjoyed it!
Playing with his train track in the garden! :)
Cuddling up with his bunny on the beanbag :)
Hello?
Enjoying bath time :)
Fast asleep cuddling his polar bear! He loves to snuggle up holding a cuddly toy when he sleeps, we found him fast asleep still at 8am a week ago or so, and Jonathan went in to take photos :)
Robert enjoying the nice weather in his paddling pool :)
And drinking the water... which had sun cream all in it where it had washed off Robert a little!! Nice!
Going down the slide all wet... shooting off the end and giving himself a slide phobia... argh!
Helping Mummy sweep the pebbles back up - really need to lay paving slabs there instead of those damned pebbles!!
Anyway that's about it!
If I don't update before, then I probably won't until the 20th at least, possibly 21st. I have my 24 (+4) week appointment on the 21st so will probably update then.
I'll try and get my 24 week photo taken on holiday if I remember! I think it's grown loads since 20 weeks already! I just love having a bump! Makes me feel just so much more attractive than when I'm just fat! (But still, once the bump goes, I'm definitely going to get rid of the fat!!!) I'm doing quite well lately on not gaining much weight, the last two weeks I've gained no weight at all to speak of, there's been less than 1lb fluctuation each week which I'm really pleased about, I don't particularly want to lose weight, I just don't want to gain much!! So despite gaining about a stone in 3-4 weeks previously I've tried to be sensible and so far it's working. Although I bet I'll have gained when I step on the scales after the holiday! lol! Right, back to business! Hope you have a great week and a half (or so!)
Thursday, 20 May 2010
20 weeks pregnant! Half way!
I cannot believe I am posting to say I am half way through this pregnancy already! Where has the time gone?
But before I do carry on I want to say THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! to the commenters on the last entry! I miss getting comments, they make me smile!
Anyway! 20 weeks. TWENTY weeks! I cannot believe we are here already!
I feel Squidge kicking several times every day! I LOVE it! And, big news, about 5 days ago, Jonathan felt him kicking for the first time! This is WAY earlier than with Robert, which happened around 21 and a half weeks. So over TWO weeks earlier! Squidge is kicking as I am typing this, and it's making me smile. How I LOVE love LOVE the kicks and wriggles! And I'm glad because last night Squidge was in a different position to normal and was booting my bladder! Eeeeshk! I completely forgot the whole bladder booting feeling! But he seems to be back in a normal position and booting the front of my belly. :)
Talking of bellies, I have a belly picture!
Taken a few minutes ago. :) I'll update the belly gallery later, there should be a 13 week one there but it's not linked in on the right yet, something else to do! And add an ultrasound gallery! Woop!
Oh and for comparison - here is Robert's 20 week belly picture
And on the matter of ultrasounds, my next scan is in 8 days. I'm so excited! We are still holding strong on not finding out the sex (although Jonathan would still happily find out if I changed my mind). I keep thinking in the back of my mind how I would like to find out, and then I think to the birth day of Squidge, and how lovely it would be to find out then! And especially if my mum is there, to have the baby born, see what sex it is, and then introduce the baby to my mum with his/her name :)
Talking of names! (wow, I'm flitting about a bit aren't I!! So much to talk about!) We have FINALLY got somewhere with names! :) Girl's name is 100% decided, boy's name is decided too but I think a little less than the girl's name. I think we both like the girl's name more than the boy's name we've picked out, so I guess the boy's name is subject to change. I don't know if I want to share the names we've chosen yet! :)
One thing I will say is that the girl's name hasn't even been mentioned here at all! I just saw it on a name site, and thought "hmm, yeah I'll put that on the list" and then Jonathan saw it and said "Oh, I really like that name" and then I thought about it, and the more I think about it the more I love it! Her middle name though is one that's been mentioned here before :) I'm so excited that we've finally got names we agree on! It's a shame the boy's name isn't as WOW as the girl's name, if you know what I mean, but we'll see :)
Back on the note of pregnancy, I am feeling completely well! Apart from having to pee at 6am every morning if I've not already been even earlier in the morning! I had one slight twinge of heartburn about a week ago which disappeared fairly quickly, and nothing since. Looking back I was already riddled with heartburn by this stage with Robert!
Also, I have weighed myself, as I know I weighed myself around this stage of my pregnancy with Robert, and I am around 14 stone 11lb, a few days before my second scan with Robert I was 15 stone 11lb, so unless I gain a stone in 2 weeks I am lighter at this stage than I was with Robert :) I am very happy about this although I am fast gaining on 15 stone so I think I will more than likely be at least 15 and a half stone by the time baby is born, if not 16+ so I will need to lose 4 stone to reach my goal of 12 stone by the time baby is a year old. I am still determined to make sure I give myself a thorough kick up the backside to lose this weight and get down to a healthy happy weight! Within 2 years of the birth I would ideally like to be down to my ideal weight of around 10 stone, if I'm not already pregnant again hahaha! But I would be happy to start off another pregnancy at 12 stone rather than 14 stone+ I've had with Robert and Squidge ;)
Anyway, here's to another good 20 weeks, and I really hope they don't whizz by too quickly! (these have gone by so fast I can't believe how fast it's all gone!!)
But before I do carry on I want to say THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! to the commenters on the last entry! I miss getting comments, they make me smile!
Anyway! 20 weeks. TWENTY weeks! I cannot believe we are here already!
I feel Squidge kicking several times every day! I LOVE it! And, big news, about 5 days ago, Jonathan felt him kicking for the first time! This is WAY earlier than with Robert, which happened around 21 and a half weeks. So over TWO weeks earlier! Squidge is kicking as I am typing this, and it's making me smile. How I LOVE love LOVE the kicks and wriggles! And I'm glad because last night Squidge was in a different position to normal and was booting my bladder! Eeeeshk! I completely forgot the whole bladder booting feeling! But he seems to be back in a normal position and booting the front of my belly. :)
Talking of bellies, I have a belly picture!
Taken a few minutes ago. :) I'll update the belly gallery later, there should be a 13 week one there but it's not linked in on the right yet, something else to do! And add an ultrasound gallery! Woop!
Oh and for comparison - here is Robert's 20 week belly picture
And on the matter of ultrasounds, my next scan is in 8 days. I'm so excited! We are still holding strong on not finding out the sex (although Jonathan would still happily find out if I changed my mind). I keep thinking in the back of my mind how I would like to find out, and then I think to the birth day of Squidge, and how lovely it would be to find out then! And especially if my mum is there, to have the baby born, see what sex it is, and then introduce the baby to my mum with his/her name :)
Talking of names! (wow, I'm flitting about a bit aren't I!! So much to talk about!) We have FINALLY got somewhere with names! :) Girl's name is 100% decided, boy's name is decided too but I think a little less than the girl's name. I think we both like the girl's name more than the boy's name we've picked out, so I guess the boy's name is subject to change. I don't know if I want to share the names we've chosen yet! :)
One thing I will say is that the girl's name hasn't even been mentioned here at all! I just saw it on a name site, and thought "hmm, yeah I'll put that on the list" and then Jonathan saw it and said "Oh, I really like that name" and then I thought about it, and the more I think about it the more I love it! Her middle name though is one that's been mentioned here before :) I'm so excited that we've finally got names we agree on! It's a shame the boy's name isn't as WOW as the girl's name, if you know what I mean, but we'll see :)
Back on the note of pregnancy, I am feeling completely well! Apart from having to pee at 6am every morning if I've not already been even earlier in the morning! I had one slight twinge of heartburn about a week ago which disappeared fairly quickly, and nothing since. Looking back I was already riddled with heartburn by this stage with Robert!
Also, I have weighed myself, as I know I weighed myself around this stage of my pregnancy with Robert, and I am around 14 stone 11lb, a few days before my second scan with Robert I was 15 stone 11lb, so unless I gain a stone in 2 weeks I am lighter at this stage than I was with Robert :) I am very happy about this although I am fast gaining on 15 stone so I think I will more than likely be at least 15 and a half stone by the time baby is born, if not 16+ so I will need to lose 4 stone to reach my goal of 12 stone by the time baby is a year old. I am still determined to make sure I give myself a thorough kick up the backside to lose this weight and get down to a healthy happy weight! Within 2 years of the birth I would ideally like to be down to my ideal weight of around 10 stone, if I'm not already pregnant again hahaha! But I would be happy to start off another pregnancy at 12 stone rather than 14 stone+ I've had with Robert and Squidge ;)
Anyway, here's to another good 20 weeks, and I really hope they don't whizz by too quickly! (these have gone by so fast I can't believe how fast it's all gone!!)
Thursday, 6 May 2010
18 weeks - anniversary tomorrow, signing
Well tomorrow is mine and Jonathan's 5th wedding anniversary, and 9th "being together" anniversary. We've had our ups and downs but it's hard to believe that we've been together for so long, considering I'm not even in my 30s yet, that next year we will have been together a whole decade, and I still would not be in my 30s. Next year we will have been married for 6 years, together for 10 years, and have two beautiful children.
I can hardly believe how lucky I am, that my husband just fell into my lap so to speak, that we found each other and are so happy together. That we have been able to work through tough patches (and as a result are still together) and puts us in good stead to be together for a long long time, hopefully as they say til death do us part. We have been so lucky on so many counts, that we have had fabulous support from family in particular, both financial and emotional, which puts us in a very fortunate position for the future, despite us having made mistakes on when we bought this house and got out a fixed rate mortgage for 5 years (sigh).
And now I am nearly half way through "cooking" our second child (lol, that phrase makes me giggle), and enjoying every moment! I think I am eating *slightly* better than my first pregnancy. I am certainly more active! Having looked back on my first pregnancy I am having a lot easier time so far of it. Although with this one I have had more bleeding (only spotting but still far far more than with Robert), but less of everything else. At this point in my pregnancy I was already suffering with heartburn on occasion, whereas no sign of this whatsoever yet! But there is plenty more time for me to suffer with heartburn, SPD, swollen ankles and feet, etc like I did with Robert.
When I lay down I can feel Squidge's rough position, last night I was fairly certain he was laying transverse, with his back along the top of my uterus.
Yes that's right, I'm saying he. Why? Two reasons. One, it's SO damn annoying to have to keep saying s/he, or his/her. Second... my friend Sarah has found out she's having a girl. And despite what I said before about me having no preference to which gender I was having, I did suddenly get a twinge. That if I did end up having a boy I would be sad, because she got her girl and I didn't get one. Which made me realise that I must have had a subconscious desire for a girl over a boy that I wasn't entirely aware of. I think that if I get it into my head that it's a boy now... that if I am convinced he's a boy, then it will be easier. But I am still thinking of leaving it as a surprise, that bit of uncertainty, so there is a small chance I am carrying a girl... does that make sense? By focussing on the good things of having another boy, then I will be happier when he arrives.
I am feeling him kick much more as well. In fact, last night as I was laying down with Robert before his bedtime, I could feel him moving around a bit. I put my hand on my tummy, and I felt a tiny pop against my hand! I'm pretty sure I can feel Squidge better than I did Robert, not only his kicks, but also him as well, when I feel my tummy. Maybe with Robert my placenta was around by my tummy, and this time it's towards my back? I've not told Jonathan about being able to feel the kicks with my hand yet, as the times Squidge is kicking hard enough to feel are so few, they're not nearly half the number of times he actually kicks.
What I find amazing is that despite having felt Robert move at 15 weeks, it wasn't until 19 weeks that I was 100% sure that I had felt a proper kick! Just goes to show I suppose that it's true, for second pregnancies you do realise that the baby is kicking sooner, as I know I've been recognising Squidge's kicks from at least 16 weeks as proper kicks.
As for breastfeeding. Robert is still breastfeeding morning and night. And he asked for it during the day yesterday as well. He is beginning to communicate much better, not only in his words, but he has finally grasped signing, that he can sign a particular way to get exactly what he wants. He only knows how to make 3 signs really, the three we use most regularly. He knows "more" very well, and "drink" not so well. He sometimes signs more when he wants a drink. He also knows milk, but he needs encouragement to use it. It won't be long before he is using signs perfectly to aid his communication with us. I told my dad about his signing, and how babies develop better control with their hands before they're able to talk, so they can communicate this way quicker, and he was quite impressed and said "oh, that's a really good idea!" and generally thought that it made sense, as it helps them to be less frustrated.
I want to teach him a few other signs, like nappy, so he will be able to sign to me when he needs a nappy change, sleep, so he can tell me when he's tired, and things like hot, cold, scared, hurt. Scared will be a tough one to do. I will have to get his grandad (my dad) over to jump out at him like he did last time we went down there (poor Robert got scared, my dad was trying to make him laugh but he was so loud and unexpected, that Robert's lip started quivering and you could tell he was frightened by it!) and then sign scared to Robert so he knows what it is lol!
Anyway I digressed. Robert is still breastfeeding, and I only ever offer milk to him at night before bed. But he always has morning milk, and if he asks during the day he gets it too. Yesterday he wanted it, so I let him. Usually downstairs he's happy to stand next to me but yesterday he wanted to climb up onto me and lay down while having his milky on the sofa. Which was nice to have some snuggles. :)
This morning after he'd had his milk, he got up all grins, and went to scoot himself off the bed, and on the way I heard him burp, which made me quite happy, surely that means he's still getting quite a lot of milk from me?
We have his 18 month hospital checkup on the 21st, just over 2 weeks time. I'm so pleased he's started to talk, even if it's just a few words, and that he communicates by signing. At the 12 month checkup I was quite worried as the questions the doctor asked us about his development (apart from physical, which he was ahead on), he seemed concerned about his language development, and doubted us when he said he could understand what we said.
Robert now understands most simple questions we ask him, if he doesn't know a particular word you can tell he gets confused. But daily tasks he does he doesn't even need to be verbally asked anymore. When he gets undressed ready for his bath he will put his clothes immediately in the wash basket (more than can be said for his dad!!!!), and when I let him down off the table naked, I will hand him his dirty nappy (in a nappy bag of course) and I don't even need to ask him, he will go and put it in the bin.
While I do of course get frustrated with him from time to time, it doesn't take much for me to melt :)
Who couldn't melt, when greeted with this...?
or this....?
:)
I can hardly believe how lucky I am, that my husband just fell into my lap so to speak, that we found each other and are so happy together. That we have been able to work through tough patches (and as a result are still together) and puts us in good stead to be together for a long long time, hopefully as they say til death do us part. We have been so lucky on so many counts, that we have had fabulous support from family in particular, both financial and emotional, which puts us in a very fortunate position for the future, despite us having made mistakes on when we bought this house and got out a fixed rate mortgage for 5 years (sigh).
And now I am nearly half way through "cooking" our second child (lol, that phrase makes me giggle), and enjoying every moment! I think I am eating *slightly* better than my first pregnancy. I am certainly more active! Having looked back on my first pregnancy I am having a lot easier time so far of it. Although with this one I have had more bleeding (only spotting but still far far more than with Robert), but less of everything else. At this point in my pregnancy I was already suffering with heartburn on occasion, whereas no sign of this whatsoever yet! But there is plenty more time for me to suffer with heartburn, SPD, swollen ankles and feet, etc like I did with Robert.
When I lay down I can feel Squidge's rough position, last night I was fairly certain he was laying transverse, with his back along the top of my uterus.
Yes that's right, I'm saying he. Why? Two reasons. One, it's SO damn annoying to have to keep saying s/he, or his/her. Second... my friend Sarah has found out she's having a girl. And despite what I said before about me having no preference to which gender I was having, I did suddenly get a twinge. That if I did end up having a boy I would be sad, because she got her girl and I didn't get one. Which made me realise that I must have had a subconscious desire for a girl over a boy that I wasn't entirely aware of. I think that if I get it into my head that it's a boy now... that if I am convinced he's a boy, then it will be easier. But I am still thinking of leaving it as a surprise, that bit of uncertainty, so there is a small chance I am carrying a girl... does that make sense? By focussing on the good things of having another boy, then I will be happier when he arrives.
I am feeling him kick much more as well. In fact, last night as I was laying down with Robert before his bedtime, I could feel him moving around a bit. I put my hand on my tummy, and I felt a tiny pop against my hand! I'm pretty sure I can feel Squidge better than I did Robert, not only his kicks, but also him as well, when I feel my tummy. Maybe with Robert my placenta was around by my tummy, and this time it's towards my back? I've not told Jonathan about being able to feel the kicks with my hand yet, as the times Squidge is kicking hard enough to feel are so few, they're not nearly half the number of times he actually kicks.
What I find amazing is that despite having felt Robert move at 15 weeks, it wasn't until 19 weeks that I was 100% sure that I had felt a proper kick! Just goes to show I suppose that it's true, for second pregnancies you do realise that the baby is kicking sooner, as I know I've been recognising Squidge's kicks from at least 16 weeks as proper kicks.
As for breastfeeding. Robert is still breastfeeding morning and night. And he asked for it during the day yesterday as well. He is beginning to communicate much better, not only in his words, but he has finally grasped signing, that he can sign a particular way to get exactly what he wants. He only knows how to make 3 signs really, the three we use most regularly. He knows "more" very well, and "drink" not so well. He sometimes signs more when he wants a drink. He also knows milk, but he needs encouragement to use it. It won't be long before he is using signs perfectly to aid his communication with us. I told my dad about his signing, and how babies develop better control with their hands before they're able to talk, so they can communicate this way quicker, and he was quite impressed and said "oh, that's a really good idea!" and generally thought that it made sense, as it helps them to be less frustrated.
I want to teach him a few other signs, like nappy, so he will be able to sign to me when he needs a nappy change, sleep, so he can tell me when he's tired, and things like hot, cold, scared, hurt. Scared will be a tough one to do. I will have to get his grandad (my dad) over to jump out at him like he did last time we went down there (poor Robert got scared, my dad was trying to make him laugh but he was so loud and unexpected, that Robert's lip started quivering and you could tell he was frightened by it!) and then sign scared to Robert so he knows what it is lol!
Anyway I digressed. Robert is still breastfeeding, and I only ever offer milk to him at night before bed. But he always has morning milk, and if he asks during the day he gets it too. Yesterday he wanted it, so I let him. Usually downstairs he's happy to stand next to me but yesterday he wanted to climb up onto me and lay down while having his milky on the sofa. Which was nice to have some snuggles. :)
This morning after he'd had his milk, he got up all grins, and went to scoot himself off the bed, and on the way I heard him burp, which made me quite happy, surely that means he's still getting quite a lot of milk from me?
We have his 18 month hospital checkup on the 21st, just over 2 weeks time. I'm so pleased he's started to talk, even if it's just a few words, and that he communicates by signing. At the 12 month checkup I was quite worried as the questions the doctor asked us about his development (apart from physical, which he was ahead on), he seemed concerned about his language development, and doubted us when he said he could understand what we said.
Robert now understands most simple questions we ask him, if he doesn't know a particular word you can tell he gets confused. But daily tasks he does he doesn't even need to be verbally asked anymore. When he gets undressed ready for his bath he will put his clothes immediately in the wash basket (more than can be said for his dad!!!!), and when I let him down off the table naked, I will hand him his dirty nappy (in a nappy bag of course) and I don't even need to ask him, he will go and put it in the bin.
While I do of course get frustrated with him from time to time, it doesn't take much for me to melt :)
Who couldn't melt, when greeted with this...?
or this....?
:)
Saturday, 1 May 2010
17 weeks 2 days - active Squidge!
I've not been feeling too good for a few days now. Thursday afternoon I was quite irritable, by Thursday evening I was tired, my eyes were just ACHING and I just wanted to go to bed! Friday morning I woke up with a pounding head, a blocked nose, and a head just completely full of fluff! Jonathan suggested he took Robert to his parents for the morning, and I agreed. I took some paracetomol, got Robert ready, and off they went (after checking of course they were ok with it!). How lucky am I to have such wonderful retired in-laws? :) In the end they ended up having Robert the ENTIRE day and well I feel a little bad about having a lovely day relaxing and only missing my baby boy by the end of the day ;) I did a few bits of household stuff but not as much as I originally planned in my head at the beginning of the day!
Today I was feeling better in the morning so we went out as planned with them for lunch, and also saw my sister-in-law whose husband was at a concert or something. I felt fine up until about 3 o'clock or thereabouts. Jonathan, my mother-in-law, Robert and I had gone out for a walk around the village to the local park (which apparently is getting a huge amount of funding to spruce up soon - very exciting as it only has a slide, 4 swings, a see-saw and a basketball hoop) and then we went back via a field that had sheep in it (don't worry they never let us get close!) and I started getting a bad headache during the walk, and took some paracetomol when I got back, then started to feel tired again.
I laid down on the sofa for a while, and when I did, I felt *pop* *pop* going on as little Squidge thought this the perfect moment to do some kung fu in my belly :) What surprised me most was the force behind those little kicks as they were significantly harder than any other kicks I've felt recently! So much so I even put my hand on my belly to see if they could be felt from the outside! And I am actually thinking I *may* have felt one with my hand shortly into his/her kicking session!
It has made me more determined to set aside some "quiet" time during each day to lie down and see if I can feel Squidge as I nearly cried today I cherished every single kick with a big smile on my face :) I have been on the go all during this pregnancy and today I just realised how I should really just spend some time to enjoy the good things about it, especially now I am into the "good part"! ;)
I am still feeling pretty awful tonight, but hopefully Squidge will cheer me up somewhat later. :) And I have just under 4 weeks to go until I see Squidge again. Part of me feels a little strange that I won't be finding out the sex, that I'll be avoiding looking there, that Squidge will remain a s/he, but I'm so looking forward to seeing him/her again, seeing the cute profile, and hopefully finding out that s/he is just about as perfect as can be!
Another thing I am thinking of doing, is getting together some albums. As some of you know I make graphics, I am thinking of putting together scrapbooking pages of Robert, ranging from in the womb, newborn, BLW, new skills he has learnt gradually, and getting them all put into a lovely album as a wonderful keepsake for us, and then for Robert to have when he gets older. I would love to get started on this now, but it's nearly 11pm and I am getting tired. It might well be something I have to start at a later point, but I've wanted to get a proper PHYSICAL keepsake for Robert. We have so so many photos, all online... graphics I've made and had made for me... online... and other things like that. It would be lovely to have something to flick through and to show friends and family. So many things have progressed into the virtual world, now and again it's nice to revert back to the real world. :)
Today I was feeling better in the morning so we went out as planned with them for lunch, and also saw my sister-in-law whose husband was at a concert or something. I felt fine up until about 3 o'clock or thereabouts. Jonathan, my mother-in-law, Robert and I had gone out for a walk around the village to the local park (which apparently is getting a huge amount of funding to spruce up soon - very exciting as it only has a slide, 4 swings, a see-saw and a basketball hoop) and then we went back via a field that had sheep in it (don't worry they never let us get close!) and I started getting a bad headache during the walk, and took some paracetomol when I got back, then started to feel tired again.
I laid down on the sofa for a while, and when I did, I felt *pop* *pop* going on as little Squidge thought this the perfect moment to do some kung fu in my belly :) What surprised me most was the force behind those little kicks as they were significantly harder than any other kicks I've felt recently! So much so I even put my hand on my belly to see if they could be felt from the outside! And I am actually thinking I *may* have felt one with my hand shortly into his/her kicking session!
It has made me more determined to set aside some "quiet" time during each day to lie down and see if I can feel Squidge as I nearly cried today I cherished every single kick with a big smile on my face :) I have been on the go all during this pregnancy and today I just realised how I should really just spend some time to enjoy the good things about it, especially now I am into the "good part"! ;)
I am still feeling pretty awful tonight, but hopefully Squidge will cheer me up somewhat later. :) And I have just under 4 weeks to go until I see Squidge again. Part of me feels a little strange that I won't be finding out the sex, that I'll be avoiding looking there, that Squidge will remain a s/he, but I'm so looking forward to seeing him/her again, seeing the cute profile, and hopefully finding out that s/he is just about as perfect as can be!
Another thing I am thinking of doing, is getting together some albums. As some of you know I make graphics, I am thinking of putting together scrapbooking pages of Robert, ranging from in the womb, newborn, BLW, new skills he has learnt gradually, and getting them all put into a lovely album as a wonderful keepsake for us, and then for Robert to have when he gets older. I would love to get started on this now, but it's nearly 11pm and I am getting tired. It might well be something I have to start at a later point, but I've wanted to get a proper PHYSICAL keepsake for Robert. We have so so many photos, all online... graphics I've made and had made for me... online... and other things like that. It would be lovely to have something to flick through and to show friends and family. So many things have progressed into the virtual world, now and again it's nice to revert back to the real world. :)
Monday, 26 April 2010
16 weeks 4 days - Robert's first word!
So... you mostly already know, but last night my baby boy said his first word! I'm not entirely sure if he's using it in the right context (he might think it means tickles) but he kept squealing in the cutest little voice "egg-GEH!" after I'd tickle him and ask if I should do it again :) He is just such a little poppet! (most of the time!)
Also what is really cute is how now, when he's having his bedtime milk, I will say to him "do you want Mummy to sing you a song?" and he'll sort of grunt at me while feeding, and his whole little body moves with the emphasis :) Today I was feeding him, and bless him he looked sooo sleepy (usually he's wide awake and playing with his hands) and just lying there peacefully, his eyes keeping on drooping and eventually he loosened his latch and I said to him "do you want to go to bed?" and he grunted a little and loosened his latch more. When I took him into his room I said goodnight, and told him I loved him like usual, and he remembers that I also give him a kiss, and he turned towards me with his mouth open for a kiss :) (still got the open mouthed kisses! But I shall miss them so much when he learns to kiss properly!)
This photo just makes my heart melt! (and I'm SO SO pleased that Jonathan kept it, he's notorious for deleting ANY photo that's not perfectly sharp, regardless of whether it's an otherwise good photo!)
I just love him so so so much, and that just far outweighs any exasperation or frustration I ever have with him!
As for my pregnancy... this week I am feeling far more kicks and also, for the first time, fairly early wriggles!! I never felt wriggles this early with Robert, and I did always ponder the description of "fluttering" but now I know they were on about baby moving, somersalting, rather than kicking, which feels like the popping bubbles :) I don't feel movements or kicks every day, but I do feel them quite often now, which I am just loving!!
I am also excited because I found out today that Jonathan has definitely booked us a holiday for the middle of June! I've not been on a holiday for years and as I'll only be 23/24 weeks along that week I'll be feeling not too big and heavy, feeling lots of lovely kicks. :) Our first (and last!) holiday with just the three of us! Because just four months after we'll be a family of 4!
Anyway, that's all for now, I doubt it'll be long before I'm updating again!
Also what is really cute is how now, when he's having his bedtime milk, I will say to him "do you want Mummy to sing you a song?" and he'll sort of grunt at me while feeding, and his whole little body moves with the emphasis :) Today I was feeding him, and bless him he looked sooo sleepy (usually he's wide awake and playing with his hands) and just lying there peacefully, his eyes keeping on drooping and eventually he loosened his latch and I said to him "do you want to go to bed?" and he grunted a little and loosened his latch more. When I took him into his room I said goodnight, and told him I loved him like usual, and he remembers that I also give him a kiss, and he turned towards me with his mouth open for a kiss :) (still got the open mouthed kisses! But I shall miss them so much when he learns to kiss properly!)
This photo just makes my heart melt! (and I'm SO SO pleased that Jonathan kept it, he's notorious for deleting ANY photo that's not perfectly sharp, regardless of whether it's an otherwise good photo!)
I just love him so so so much, and that just far outweighs any exasperation or frustration I ever have with him!
As for my pregnancy... this week I am feeling far more kicks and also, for the first time, fairly early wriggles!! I never felt wriggles this early with Robert, and I did always ponder the description of "fluttering" but now I know they were on about baby moving, somersalting, rather than kicking, which feels like the popping bubbles :) I don't feel movements or kicks every day, but I do feel them quite often now, which I am just loving!!
I am also excited because I found out today that Jonathan has definitely booked us a holiday for the middle of June! I've not been on a holiday for years and as I'll only be 23/24 weeks along that week I'll be feeling not too big and heavy, feeling lots of lovely kicks. :) Our first (and last!) holiday with just the three of us! Because just four months after we'll be a family of 4!
Anyway, that's all for now, I doubt it'll be long before I'm updating again!
Monday, 5 April 2010
Squidge's Belly Gallery
Well here's Squidge's Belly Gallery.
13 weeks (and 1 day)
15 weeks (and 4 days)
20 weeks
24 weeks (and 1 day)
28 weeks
32 weeks
34 weeks
36 weeks (and 1 day)
38 weeks
13 weeks (and 1 day)
15 weeks (and 4 days)
20 weeks
24 weeks (and 1 day)
28 weeks
32 weeks
34 weeks
36 weeks (and 1 day)
38 weeks
Wednesday, 24 March 2010
11 weeks 6 days - grandparents
All the grandparents know, and all the aunts and uncles know! Got a mixture of surprised reactions and "ah we kind of guessed" reactions. My dad's was by far the most surprised. He opened up the framed picture, looked at it, blinked a few times as if he was taking it in and processing it lol, and then his jaw dropped, he blinked again, and said "shit shit shit shit shit!" hahaha! When he composed himself he turned around and congratulated us, and again, as with Robert, told Jonathan "well done" lmao.
We had a lovely weekend in all, although when we got home from Kent on Sunday evening we had a rather sombre telephone message from my Mum... she had had problems with a virus while we were there and she had been scanning her PC over and over trying to clean it out and each time it kept finding more infected files. Anyway the message basically said that the virus had made her bank website go to a different site when she opened it up, and she said without thinking even though she thought it was strange she put in her password when it asked (although banks usually only ask for 3 random characters nowadays, this one asked for her whole password), and she found out on Sunday evening that her bank account had been cleared out of almost £2000... Just goes to show how vigilant you must be, especially when it comes to online banking, but also with downloading things you've got to be so careful of the source, I do wonder exactly how much junk she managed to download with her online games and internet toolbars etc. I hope she's more careful when downloading things, she was in such a state, understandably :(
Anyway. I'm still feeling fairly well with this pregnancy. I think I must be one of the lucky ones, that my sickness is barely anything to write home about, and I really think that one day must have been a bug, or at least the "peak" of my morning sickness as that's the only day I've had anywhere near that bad!
I look at fetal development sites regularly, but what is annoying is that they conflict so much. One says that at 12 weeks the baby is about 5cm long, and another says it's 8cm long.
If the sonographer at the scan can date the pregnancy from how long the fetus is, then surely the figures should be universal?! It is somewhat confusing, but so exciting knowing roughly how big the baby is. I hold up my fingers to roughly the length it says and just think "wow, my baby is that big already!"
Jonathan has jokingly wanted to call the baby Sausage 2 (sigh) or Cletus before we know the sex and come up with names (still no names decided for baby - Jonathan is being particularly slow and just not looking at any, and since he doesn't like any of mine it's up to him to pull his finger out of his arse!!), both of which.. no thank you lol! Sausage 2 just sounds stupid. Cletus (the fetus) sounds silly too. But as I was brushing my teeth last night I was thinking about Robert and how gorgeous he'd been that day, and how I just loved to squidge him.. and I thought "hmmmm Squidge" and I dunno, I like it :) My little Squidge! When it's born, I can give my little Squidge a big squidge! lol!
We had a lovely weekend in all, although when we got home from Kent on Sunday evening we had a rather sombre telephone message from my Mum... she had had problems with a virus while we were there and she had been scanning her PC over and over trying to clean it out and each time it kept finding more infected files. Anyway the message basically said that the virus had made her bank website go to a different site when she opened it up, and she said without thinking even though she thought it was strange she put in her password when it asked (although banks usually only ask for 3 random characters nowadays, this one asked for her whole password), and she found out on Sunday evening that her bank account had been cleared out of almost £2000... Just goes to show how vigilant you must be, especially when it comes to online banking, but also with downloading things you've got to be so careful of the source, I do wonder exactly how much junk she managed to download with her online games and internet toolbars etc. I hope she's more careful when downloading things, she was in such a state, understandably :(
Anyway. I'm still feeling fairly well with this pregnancy. I think I must be one of the lucky ones, that my sickness is barely anything to write home about, and I really think that one day must have been a bug, or at least the "peak" of my morning sickness as that's the only day I've had anywhere near that bad!
I look at fetal development sites regularly, but what is annoying is that they conflict so much. One says that at 12 weeks the baby is about 5cm long, and another says it's 8cm long.
If the sonographer at the scan can date the pregnancy from how long the fetus is, then surely the figures should be universal?! It is somewhat confusing, but so exciting knowing roughly how big the baby is. I hold up my fingers to roughly the length it says and just think "wow, my baby is that big already!"
Jonathan has jokingly wanted to call the baby Sausage 2 (sigh) or Cletus before we know the sex and come up with names (still no names decided for baby - Jonathan is being particularly slow and just not looking at any, and since he doesn't like any of mine it's up to him to pull his finger out of his arse!!), both of which.. no thank you lol! Sausage 2 just sounds stupid. Cletus (the fetus) sounds silly too. But as I was brushing my teeth last night I was thinking about Robert and how gorgeous he'd been that day, and how I just loved to squidge him.. and I thought "hmmmm Squidge" and I dunno, I like it :) My little Squidge! When it's born, I can give my little Squidge a big squidge! lol!
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