Difference of opinion.

I am well aware that with regards to feeding a baby, no matter infancy, or the introduction of solids, or what, but there will ALWAYS be a difference of opinion amongst even the best of friends, the closest of family.

What I was not prepared for though was the attack I was on the receiving end of yesterday.

I went to the park with the boys to meet my friend, S, who lives down the road. We had a nice chat, I played with the older boys on the swings while she fed her daughter. Then came the weaning discussion. It started off gently, then progressed to slightly heated with both of us standing our ground as to what we believed in, then suddenly, BAM.

"I think that people who don't start to wean their babies by 4 months are cruel, and starving them."

*blink*

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. My good friend, who KNOWS we are waiting until 6 months to wean Christopher, coming out with that while staring stonily into my eyes.

What she was referring to, was of course the article in the British Medical Journal regarding breastfed babies, and their lack of belief that 6 months exclusive breastfeeding was best for the baby, that the delay could bring about allergies and a lack of iron. Well I'm not going to turn this into a debate, but as far as I'm concerned, the response by The Analytical Armadillo says it all.

Anyway, I replied "You think I am cruel and starving Christopher?"

"Oh, no." she replied. "I don't know Christopher."

But it was what she meant. I went and got Robert, too angry to be able to rationalise with him why we had to go home, thus I had a screaming toddler who didn't understand why he had to leave the park so suddenly without warning :( As I left the park, she called after me "I've been wanting to tell you that for ages, but you wouldn't listen".

So THAT'S why she only has wanted to meet at the park lately. Because she was planning on dropping that nice little nugget into conversation and guessed how I would take it. Well, it appears my friend wasn't a friend at all. When she started weaning at 3 months, did I say anything? No. Did I start berating her choice and state my opinions on weaning early? No. Why? Because I valued our friendship. I knew she wouldn't understand, I knew she wouldn't do anything differently, so I let it slip by, after all, each baby is different right?

I was physically shaking as I was walking home and even for a while afterwards from the anger that my friend had said that to me. That she had stomped all over our friendship like that. Cruel. Starving. FUCKING CRUEL. What person calls their friend CRUEL? My baby is happy, healthy, growing well, meeting developmental milestones, yet is, apparently, starving. My baby who rarely cries, who laughs and smiles all the time, shows curiosity and amazement at his world, is the victim of CRUELTY at the hands of his mother, who has refused to shove bland blended vegetable mush into his mouth, but instead has chosen to wait til he can put the food into his mouth himself. Call the social services!!!! This baby is CLEARLY malnourished!!!!



And.. breathe.

Anyhow. Having played the senario out in my head all evening, and even when I woke in the middle of the night, annoyed I hadn't said certain things, and so on, I woke this morning, and it suddenly clicked. I don't need her friendship, not if she can act like that. And just because I have lost her friendship, there's no reason why I have to mope. None at all. Today I woke with a fresh view, a fresh outlook. My day-to-day life had become a little stagnant to be honest, I suppose cabin fever had set in. Each day, I am going to arrange to get out of the house, either in the morning or the afternoon. This morning I went on the buggy walk which the SureStart Centre do each Thursday morning. And in the morning/afternoon we are inside, I will do a fun activity with Robert (and maybe Christopher, weather and activity depending!). This afternoon we will make biscuits. He really enjoys making them, and then seeing them cook through the oven door. And then of course eating them! :)

We made some a few weeks back.







Tomorrow morning will be playgroup, which S has come to in the past, but hasn't for a good few weeks now, so I'm not anticipating she'll go again, but even if she does, the hall is plenty big enough to ignore her. Then in the afternoon Jonathan should be home early, as he's been working up extra hours this week, and tried to head into work early the last couple of days. So we might go out somewhere, or maybe he'll do something fun with the boys while I have a well earned relax - maybe a bath!! ;)

This weekend we are seeing my dad and step-mum. I can't wait, they absolutely adore the boys, and Robert particularly has got to the age where he LOVES seeing his grandparents, and the lucky boy has THREE sets!! He adores talking to them on the phone, and sometimes even brings me the phone and says "Ubberd eek Dadad!" (Robert speak Grandad)

It would be lovely to go out somewhere with them where Robert can run around and we all get a bit of fresh air and exercise! Something I intend to get a lot more of. Healthy and fit by summer, ready to play with my two gorgeous boys!