Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Tuesday, 23 August 2016

11 weeks along with baby number 4, little Pipkin

All the grandparents now know they are expecting another precious grandchild come March next year. We've not told siblings yet but will do once we have the scan no doubt. The scan is at the moment set for 2nd September late afternoon,which isn't very convenient due to the fact that we are on holiday from this Friday til next Friday (2nd September). I've tried phoning up three or four times to rearrange it but no luck getting through or getting a callback (I've left 2 messages so far). It might be possible just to get to the appointment on time but it will be close and will rob our chance to break the journey with a few hours at a park or something else.

We will be going with my inlaws this time. We don't usually holiday with our parents, but we have decided to this year because my father-in-law got a poor prognosis diagnosis of prostate cancer earlier in the year. He has just finished his last session of chemotherapy last Thursday so he should be feeling fine on the holiday. It'll be lovely for us all to create some lovely memories together!

Changing the subject, at the weekend we told my dad and step-mum about Pipkin. How we announced it was we signed a birthday card with Pipkin's name along with our own. I wrote something along the lines of how I hoped he didn't spent the entire birthday party the day before under an umbrella, which he answered, but completely missed Pipkin's mention underneath! 😂 He turned to talk to one of the boys while my step-mum picked up the card, read it, and we watched her reactions carefully. Her eyes widened, she turned to us, mouth open slightly and said "is this an announcement?" When we nodded, she said with amusement "he didn't notice did he?" *head shake* "um, love, I think you should read your card again!" Haha! Reactions have greatly been positive/neutral which I'm grateful for. I haven't been expecting hugely excited reactions like you tend to get for number one (and maybe number two) but as long as they're not negative that's great.

Other news, the morning sickness has returned, I'm generally feeling pretty pants. It's a bit worse too as I've actually retched a few times before I made myself take a sip of water or lie down. Still grateful that I have it mildly compared to some, but it is definitely hampering my ability to function in day to day stuff. Making meals is difficult. Staying upright is difficult. The list of jobs I want to get done before our week away is not getting any shorter which isn't good. I felt sick all day yesterday. I managed to set the washing machine going, make meals for the boys, and sweep the floor. That's about it. I need to hang up yesterday's washing, get another load on, clear and clean the inside of the car (although just clearing it will be better than nothing), and make a start packing the suitcases. I woke this morning feeling better, but the sickness is descending again, but I am determined to power through. If I get at least one job ticked off the list I will be happy. I will do this!

Thanks for your private congratulations, and your comments. I know I'm not a frequent poster anymore. Xx

Saturday, 7 April 2012

Tonsillitis

Unfortunately Robert came down quite I'll on Wednesday. He had a bad cough and was very tired most of the day. He had two naps, one from 10am til 12pm, and then another from 2pm til 4pm. He doesn't usually have any naps unless he's had a busy day and then he might fall asleep in the car.

That night was horrible. He woke up so much whimpering and screaming for us, I went into him 4 or 5 times, for him to simply fall back to sleep with a word or two, I tried to get him to take some calpol but he kept just falling back to sleep. Jonathan got up to him about 7 times.

I had a doctor appointment on Thursday morning for Christopher anyway for the red patches around his mouth he's had for ages, so mentioned Robert to her and she agreed to look "quickly". She took his temp (fine), took a look in his ears (fine), then looked in his mouth and when she'd finished, said "well he has tonsillitis!" very matter of factly, and prescribed him some anti biotics which she said would speed up recovery by about a day.

What it has meant is that we've had to cancel our Easter weekend plans. We were going to go and see Alice on Friday, then on to Kent to see my parents. Due to my brother and his kids being there too, meant I couldn't have gone down to Kent today instead because tonsillitis is contagious. Otherwise we could have maybe gone down if Robert had been up for it, and maybe seen Alice on Monday instead if everyone was well enough.

This weekend thus far is feeling decidedly dull, but it's not to be helped.

Maybe I'll get some good news next week to make up for the disappointment.

Tuesday, 27 March 2012

Catch up post!

Wow, it's been TWO weeks since I last posted! Such a long time! Part of what frustrates me is that I want to write a post about a trip or a day and the photos aren't ready for it yet, so I end up post-poning, and then forgetting about it!

Here's a post about our trip up to see our new niece Amelia, and of course Ewan, and their lovely parents, my big brother Stephen and his wife Nicky.

The journey up to see them is about 3 hours from us, including a break. Robert was in pants by this stage, finally, and he went to the toilet before we left, again at the service station, and then when we got there. The boys were so good in the car! Christopher slept most of the journey, and Robert seems content a lot of the time to just gaze out of the window watching the world whizz by. The evening before, we managed to coax Robert up to bed very easily, as he was SO excited to go and see his big cousin Ewan. The two cousins are almost one year apart. Their birthdays are just five days apart! They just adore playing together, and I know they will be such good friends when they are older, even more so than they are now! Ewan took charge fairly quickly, telling us to put our shoes in the porch so the floor didn't get slippy, and the two boys enjoyed spending a lot of time up in Ewan's room! We arrived around lunch time, so the boys sat down almost straight away for some lunch.



While the boys were eating lunch, I got cuddles with the precious Amelia




She was a couple of months old when we went, which amazes me as she was still SO tiny! You forget how they stay small for longer than you think!

Christopher was fascinated with Amelia, but Robert didn't pay her much attention, as he was having SO much fun with Ewan!



All three boys got to play in the garden for a while before we headed out to dinner at a restaurant.






Two cousins eating some flapjack shortly before heading out to the restaurant!


The next day we went back to Stephen and Nicky's. Stephen had to go to work but he was still there when we arrived which was good to see him again. We decided to head off to the aquarium that day and have some lunch there, before heading home.

The boys really enjoyed the aquarium. Christopher especially was transfixed with the fish, especially when we went through the tunnel!








At one point we saw some divers go in, and at first I thought they were children as they looked so small! But then I realised it must have been the thickness of the glass and the water refracting, when we realised that, we then thought wow, how big must those sharks really have been?!

Amelia slept through most of the aquarium visit. She woke up around lunch time to have some milk. I was saddened at the weekend to discover that again, Nicky has had trouble breastfeeding, and so was supplementing heavily with formula. I know how badly she wanted to breastfeed and that although she told me she had a lot of support with lactation consultants, etc it just wasn't working out. It seems a shame that some women who decide they don't want to breastfeed have a plentiful supply and struggle with engorgement and have a lot of pain until their milk dries up, and other people like Nicky have supply issues and struggle to breastfeed because of it, even though they really want to. It just seems really unfair to me :( It makes me feel so lucky that I've been able to breastfeed easily enough, but my heart breaks for Nicky all the same :( Anyway, Amelia is such a precious little darling, and apparently is such a settled baby and very undemanding compared to her big brother! ;)

Just so so gorgeous :)



Friday, 2 March 2012

Feels odd

Christopher didn't nurse at bedtime today. He didn't seem too bothered about it, and as he was being rather squirmy in the direction of the bedroom, I asked him did he want to go to sleep, or did he want gah-gee, and he pointed/lunged towards the room he shares with Robert now. So I went in there with him and said goodnight, tucked him up in bed, and he went to sleep.

Christopher is getting much better with sleep now. He will sleep through til 5ish, when Jonathan brings him in and he nurses. He tends to get a lot of milk then, and then he'll go back to sleep, and as he doesn't sleep well in bed with us, very squirmy/climby, I go and put him back in the boys room. In the evenings, he prefers to go to bed awake and drift off by himself. He is happy to do that too, and will stop nursing, wriggle himself off the bed and go and find Jonathan to say goodnight.

Robert dropped the evening feed fairly quickly too, and hasn't nursed to sleep (besides odd moments on the sofa) for so long I can't even remember.

Tomorrow we will be going to see my brother and his family, along with new (well, 2 month old) Amelia. I am quite looking forward to it, and Robert is SO. EXCITED! to be going to see his cousin Ewan! They are only a year apart in age, and seem to get on very well, and they are both high as kites when they get together!

The bags are mostly packed and ready to go in the car, just things like toothbrushes left to go in! I'm quite looking forward to the drive, it's a lengthy one, about 3 hours, so we can share the driving this time!

Friday, 30 December 2011

Thoughts about genders

Well, yesterday my sister-in-law gave birth to a little girl, who she and my brother named Amelia. It's been a day now and I'm feeling a lot more excited and happy about it than I was when I first heard the news. She is the one who had a boy a year before Robert was born, who told me she didn't want kids at all to stop disappointment of people knowing it was taking them a while to conceive etc. I must admit, my first reaction was that of a sinking resentfulness. A stupid one of course, like the first one I felt when she was pregnant with my nephew! That once again they have "beat me" to something new for my parents. They had the first grandchild (and grandson incidentally), and now they have had the first granddaughter, despite me having two children between. Plus the fact that before Robert was "Robert" - while he was Sausage, I wanted a girl. And secretly I think I wanted Christopher to be a girl too.

It's been going round and round my head, wondering if the news that they had had a girl was disappointing to me for that reason also... because I do hope that someday I will have a daughter! And of course, I may not ever have a daughter. It did also get me thinking, also due to reading comments on my brother's photos of Amelia, or status updates, people's opinions, that having "one of each" is the "perfect" family. I hear it everywhere. See it everywhere. I've never heard, or at least not to my recollection, somebody saying "awww another boy, how perfect!" (or girl, of course) when it's a second child. (as opposed to third, where they already have "one of each"). And you see the dolls families with 2 parents, and 2 kids, the kids are always a boy and a girl. And Robert's checkout game, a boy and a girl. Charlie and Lola on TV.

I do love my BOYS so so much, and do NOT love Christopher any less because he's not a girl! (Or Robert for that matter). But I do find myself trying to conjure up homely images of the future of me with all sons and no daughters. To convince myself that it won't be all that bad. (!!) Strapping lads with their arms around me as they reach their adulthood. Boys running in the garden playing football or play wrestling. That sort of thing!

Another thing that I think of, is that if we do end up with another baby, I find myself wondering what the gender will be. I of course have no way of knowing!! But I find myself thinking all the same "I wonder if I will get a girl" or things like that. I think if we do have another baby we will find out the sex (Jonathan wanted to with Christopher it was me that stopped us! So I think Jonathan would have no problem if we have another baby), so that if it's a boy it will give me time to adjust. I do think back to the dream I had in pregnancy with Robert, that I gave birth to triplets, the first one being Robert, the second one also a boy, and the third one we thought was a boy at first but then it turned out to be a girl. It does make me wonder, if it's a kind of future telling dream, that I will have 3 kids, and well first two boys.. and if I have a third, if it will show on ultrasound (or if it's just an overwhelming thought) that it's a third boy, whether we will be surprised later by the emergence (or view on ultrasound) of a girl.

I guess it's a "time will tell" ending to this post really... All this assuming I do actually have a third child.

Saturday, 18 December 2010

Robert's 2nd birthday

Well, it's a tad late... *ahem* almost 4 weeks late! Robert's 2nd birthday came in 2 parts. He saw his grandparents (my dad and step-mum) on the Sunday before his birthday, and also my brother and sister-in-law, and my nephew. He was fairly spoilt, got lots of cards, presents, attention, etc.





My dad and step-mum arrived in the morning, and he enjoyed opening his presents (and was much more adept this time!)

Around lunchtime, my brother,sister-in-law and nephew arrived. They live a fair drive away, but they visited one of my sister-in-law's friends the day before and stayed overnight in a hotel. My nephew Ewan is 1 year older than Robert, and when it comes to birthdays, it seems that this isn't the best of age gaps!! While Ewan this year was calmer than he was last year, Robert didn't want Ewan to play with his toys! Stephen and Nicky bought Robert a train set (compatible with the one we got from tesco before), and both boys wanted to play with the trains.





Robert got very upset though when Ewan wanted to drive a train on the track Robert was playing with! It was a verrrry stressful afternoon with this basically going on all afternoon, and Robert was in tears for most of it :(

The cake (recipe grabbed from Alice - thanks Alice!) was lovely, and Robert was in awe by it (probably the size! lol!) and knew exactly what to do, as he watched his Daddy blowing out his birthday candles only a month before!

The cake ended up with a mushroom top, as it was a LOT of mixture, and I didn't think to trim it!! But so yummy.





Again, I found myself with tears pricking my eyes as I took the cake in to Robert, am I the only one who does this? I expected it with his first birthday but not with his second! He seemed to like his cake, I cut him a slice, it was thin, but still quite big for the boys, but ah well, if he can't eat a big slice of cake for his birthday, when can he? :) The cake did about 20 slices in the end!



He didn't have a nap that day, he was so worked up and excited, we didn't bother as we could just tell it'd all end up in tears. And boy, by the end of the day he was SO tired!

The next day he was much happier, he spent the whole morning (maybe even the whole day, I can't remember!) playing with his new trainset. He loved it!









He really loves his new trains, and thus began his huge obsession with trains! I would have loved to make him a train cake but I just wasn't confident enough in my train-cake-making abilities! lol! He got a few train cards which he loved driving along the floor!

On the morning of his birthday, he came downstairs to this:



He made lots of appropriate "oooh!"s and "wow!"s as he came down the stairs and saw it. The smallest present was a tub of playdough cutters, with some playdough in as well, and a rolling pin. The medium size present was a toy garage for matchbox cars (which I had spent about 20 minutes building on Sunday night, and wrapped Monday night), and the largest one is of course a trampoline. We don't have much room in the living room, so it stayed downstairs for a few days, and then went upstairs in his bedroom (which has a little bit of room, but eventually I think it'll have to go in the garden/garage, depending on the season! Especially when we move Christopher into Robert's room)

Later in the morning, we decided to take Robert out, there was a soft play attached to a restaurant, and we thought we'd go there, and then have lunch. We'd been watching the morning viewings on Cbeebies for the birthday cards, but it hadn't been on. Jonathan set up his computer to record the card viewings incase his was shown while we were out, and it was! I got a text as we sat down to eat lunch from my friend Sarah saying "We saw Robert on TV! He's famous!" lol! He enjoyed the soft play, but it being Tuesday morning during term time, we were the only ones there! Jonathan got to go in with Robert, which was probably just as well, because Robert seemed quite overwhelmed by it all (but did enjoy it, especially their ride-on Thomas the Tank Engine! Which we didn't put money in, we wouldn't have got him off of it otherwise! We let him sit in it as much as he wanted though lol)







The Saturday after we went to see Jonathan's friend, and their daughter, who turned 2 a week and a half after Robert did. They played much nicer together than Robert and Ewan did, although there were a few tears again, but not nearly as many! They enjoyed playing together, especially when they got running around the sofa (this is one of Robert's favourite past times! When I take him to a playgroup on Friday mornings which is in a big hall, he plays well for most of the morning, but usually within the last half an hour, he instigates a game of running around the hall, which usually attracts at least 3 other children to join him!!)





They brought him a tub of Potato Heads. He was absolutely fascinated by them!







And he also got a farm with some animals, from Jonathan's parents. He LOVES his farm animals, and says to me at LEAST twice a day "Mama, ay arm!" ("Mummy, play farm!"), and brings me his day-dee oop (baby sheep!) and will sit and make all the noises. He likes to let his sheep eat his breakfast (if we let him bring them up to the table!), and the sheep will often get its nose covered in marmite! :)



So yes, my biggest boy was thoroughly spoilt for his birthday! But he loves his new toys and it's so lovely seeing him enjoy them all!

Another quick photo of Christopher, he is now 12 weeks old, but here he is at 9 weeks old, shortly after I dropped the shower head on his face :( Quick call to the NHS Direct made me feel better, and it cleared up completely about 2 weeks after I did it.



He's so lovely and scrummy, I can sometimes hardly stop myself from kissing him!

Sunday, 22 August 2010

33 weeks 3 days - update, diabetes consultant.

I saw the diabetes consultant on Wednesday (at 32 weeks 6 days). Due to my diabetes, they want to induce me 2 weeks early at 38 weeks. Having had a few days to process this, I am reluctant to say yes if my cervix is not ready, but if it is ready I will most likely accept induction. They are happy to leave it to 40 weeks if I have twice-weekly monitoring but do not want my pregnancy to last any longer. I know I can refuse induction if I want to even then, but for now, I want to wait and see what happens.

I have an appointment on the 1st September again with the diabetes consultant, and as far as I am aware, I am going to get an internal on that date for them to assess my cervix. I will be 34 weeks 6 days pregnant then.

I am also expecting a growth scan date to come through the post for when I am around 36 weeks pregnant.

I am seeing Beverley (my midwife) again on the 6th September, so hopefully that won't clash with my scan.

I am thinking that I will accept induction if my cervix is getting ready. And I am actually getting quite eager about meeting my little baby, so I am going to try some home remedies to get it ready, so I am going to buy some raspberry leaf tea on Tuesday, going to try and get a birthing ball, extra walking, and so on. Not actually necessarily the labour inducing stuff, but the things that would help soften and shorten my cervix.

I will be 38 weeks pregnant on the 23rd September. I don't know if they would induce me bang on 38 weeks, but I think if I was... providing I'm ready... wow, my two children could both be born on the 23rd of the month! Robert would be exactly 22 months old if Squidge is born on 23rd September. I feel quite gobsmacked thinking that I could be giving birth a MONTH from tomorrow. When I found out I was pregnant, and due on 7th October, it never once crossed my mind that my baby could be a September baby. Robert came bang on time, but there was always the feeling that Squidge would be late.

I will be offered a sweep at 37 weeks, which would be my preferred method of induction if it works alone.

A week ago I felt a little depressed, and annoyed whenever anyone said to me "not long to go now" - for the record, I am NEVER saying that to a pregnant woman ever again unless she is in labour!!! Even if they only have 1 week to go, or a few days to go, or overdue! I now am feeling quite upbeat. I think the knowledge that if I want to I will be induced at 38 weeks has made a world of difference. It's like I know that if I get really fed up or in pain, or whatever, and I do just think "lets get the baby out" I will be able to at 38 weeks, and in fact they WANT me to. Even though at the moment I want to say no unless I am ready, if I change my mind I know my option is there, and that is just a nice comforting feeling I know from a completely selfish point of view but there we go!

Anyway so that's my situation!!

This weekend we went to Kent to see my family. I saw my brother and sister-in-law with my nephew Ewan as well which was lovely. The two boys got on better together than they did in November, but there were some sharing issues lol. Squidge and I got a lot of attention, particularly today at my Dad's party with a lot of people around. The boys got a lot of attention too, and there were so many people around it was hard to stay with Robert all the time, but there were always people around to stop anything from happening, and my step-mum's three nieces and nephews who are 13 and 14 were eager to play with both boys and keep them entertained, so I felt ok to sit and relax a bit.

Robert has had a bit of trouble with his routine this weekend with regards to nap and sleep, which resulted in a VERY grumpy and tearful little boy on Saturday night, who cried when he had to say goodbye to his Nanna, and who cried when he saw his other grandad and grandma, didn't want his teeth brushed, or his story read, or even milky, and just wanted to play with cars and threw a major tantrum and even when we put him to bed, we could hear him sobbing and calling out "car car!" He finally fell asleep but then he woke up half an hour earlier than normal the next morning, and getting him down for a nap at the normalish time (in an attempt to get his routine back on track) was a pain! But he slept then for a good amount of time, and once he was in the bath tonight before we set out for home, he was fine (although being persuaded to part from his teenage entertainers and supply of toy cars was a challenge!), and he fell asleep in the car home, and stayed sleepy after waking up when we arrived home, so he's fast asleep in his cot so here's hoping for a return to routine and a nice long sleep tonight!

Squidge is still nice and active, I get mainly wriggles and feet/elbows/hands brushing about, less kicks but when I do get a kick, they sometimes take my breath away and HURT! I love laying down and seeing Squidge wriggle about in there. I find it very comforting, and each day that passes my love and eagerness to meet Squidge grows.

There is always the feeling I think when you become pregnant with your second child, about how much you will be able to love them, how could you ever love your second child like you love your first. As the days and weeks go by, I just KNOW I will fall in love the second I see Squidge. I can't wait to call Squidge by his/her name (Boy's name STILL not decided, it probably won't be Christopher anymore but I really don't know!!!). I still have the feeling that Squidge is a girl, but tonight when I was making some tea, I don't know why but I suddenly imagined Squidge here, as a boy, and thinking "wow, a mum of 2 boys!" and that thought left a warm soft feeling inside me like I just know that even if Squidge isn't a girl like my instincts are telling me, that I will love my two boys so much, I will love BEING a mum to two boys! And strangely enough it felt at that moment "more right" if Squidge is a boy. Such an odd odd feeling but I just know that everything will be alright. My little Squidge... maybe connecting to the idea of having a boy will make it easier to find a name I like for a boy.

For now... we shall wait and see. I might only have another 4 weeks and 4 days to go of this pregnancy! It seems like such a short time now, and it really won't be long before I am beginning my next chapter, as a mum of TWO children!

Wednesday, 31 March 2010

12 weeks 6 days - 2nd trimester!

Wow, it's been ages since I last posted! I get so caught up day by day it's crazy. Each day is now it's own little routine broken up by mealtimes. Although I still don't follow the routine I set out a little while ago properly. I've not exercised for over a week now. I don't really go out for walks very often, usually only at weekends. But I get to see Sarah every week which is great. And I do spend more time with Robert.

I am SO thankful for my friendship with Sarah. I cannot get over how alike we are in so many ways, and amazed at how well we gel. We could literally spend hours with each other talking about anything and everything, and we text each other every day! And it's sooo great that we are going through pregnancy together too. She is now feeling "Boo" kick, and I so can't wait for that part too! I felt Robert kick at 15 weeks, and I'm now nearly 13. I might feel it sooner this time, but I do hope to feel it at 15 weeks by the latest. So only 2 weeks to wait before I feel Squidge kick! Fingers crossed! A few days ago I was sitting still, concentrating on feeling what was going on, and I thought I felt a few little bubbles, and got all excited, but then a few seconds later I farted LOL. So obviously just wind bubbling down through my intestines lol.

I had a lovely day yesterday. I woke up feeling quite tired, well very tired actually. Jonathan came to bed the night before and we had some couple time, which was nice, but unfortunately it woke me up fully and then he fell asleep and started snoring and wheezing away so I couldn't fall asleep! Argh! So I was knackered come morning time. I asked Jonathan if he'd mind taking Robert to his parents to give me a lie in and so I could get things done, and he did. I had a dressing gown on and got Robert dressed, went downstairs to get his jacket on, then Jonathan asked Robert to give me a kiss, and up toddles Robert to me eagerly, gives me a kiss, and then he walks out after Jonathan. It just felt so weird but nice, seeing Robert walk off like that, like he was growing up so fast. The surge of love I got at that moment was indescribable.

I went back to bed, and had an extra hour and a half sleep. It was lovely! Then I got up and was about to get dressed when I thought I should probably have a shower as I had a morning to myself, I prefer to shower in the mornings as my hair can dry better rather than being all scrunched up on the pillow at night. I had washed myself, shaved, and lathered up my hair, then I started rinsing it out when I suddenly came over feeling sick and had to go down on all fours in the shower to ease the feeling. I wretched a couple of times but I wasn't sick. I managed to just about finish rinsing my hair (had to leave the conditioner) and I got out, hurriedly dried myself and put on a dressing gown, and wrapped up my hair, went downstairs and got breakfast. I should really have got breakfast before my shower, as it was already gone 10.30. But luckily it was all ok.

Watched some Stargate Atlantis leisurely while eating breakfast, and then got dressed. Played a bit of computer game, and then I started to get things done around the house so I caught up with washing up (there was a huge pile from Sunday where we had the in-laws over for Sunday lunch), and I also changed the bedsheets (looooooong overdue) and sorted out the rubbish bins. Jonathan's parents came over 15 minutes earlier than normal for a Tuesday (they had a tired boy to deal with!) and as soon as he got back I put him up in his cot, where he was laying for quite a long time moaning, then some louder cries, then soft moaning again before he finally fell asleep. FIL and I went out shopping, and when we got back, Robert was still asleep! I enjoyed the roast so much on Sunday I bought two more lamb joints as they were half price in tesco. Shame I didn't see the offer last week! I spent £11 on half a leg of lamb then, and yesterday I spent £7.50 on a WHOLE leg of lamb!

Squidge is definitely wanting meat lately. I just soooooo want to roast a leg of lamb today just so I can pick at lamb all day! Just lamb on its own! Yum! And I still have 2 packs of bacon in the fridge, got lots of ham, and in fact I'm thinking about sausage and mash tonight!

Something else I really want to get done is my belly gallery. I took a photo early in pregnancy but it was a different place to the last belly gallery as the lense on Jonathan's new camera wouldn't take photos that close up, so I'm tempted to use the same camera I used for the last one, in the same place. I didn't really see any difference until 18+ weeks anyway so if I take my first proper one tomorrow that should be ok. If I get a third pregnancy I will be taking them more regularly as I WILL be at a healthy weight range by then and I should hopefully be showing more early! :)

Anyway, I've got a few photos for you of my little gorgeous man.

I absolutely adore this photo of Robert. His eyes look so soulful!



I used it in a graphic I did, brightened it up, smoothed it out, and brought out the colours in his eyes and made all but his eyes black and white, and I looooove it!



I just love him so much!

But since that photo was taken, I have given him his FOURTH haircut! At 16 months old, that's roughly one every 4 months!! lol! I'm pleased with this last haircut, it looks good and I think I must be getting used to it hehe! I will show you another time once my darling husband gets around to downloading them from the camera, editting them to make them brighter and then uploading them. The hair on top is slightly longer than the sides and back :D Although he has this weird thing on his scalp which makes his hair lie funny, so even though I cut all the hair ontop of his head to the same length, there is always a bit off to one side that looks like it's longer than the other side!!! Oh I love him so much. I find it so hard to believe that anyone else can get the same amount of love as what I give him but I guess that Squidge will.. it just seems so weird because Robert is already here!

Wednesday, 24 March 2010

11 weeks 6 days - grandparents

All the grandparents know, and all the aunts and uncles know! Got a mixture of surprised reactions and "ah we kind of guessed" reactions. My dad's was by far the most surprised. He opened up the framed picture, looked at it, blinked a few times as if he was taking it in and processing it lol, and then his jaw dropped, he blinked again, and said "shit shit shit shit shit!" hahaha! When he composed himself he turned around and congratulated us, and again, as with Robert, told Jonathan "well done" lmao.

We had a lovely weekend in all, although when we got home from Kent on Sunday evening we had a rather sombre telephone message from my Mum... she had had problems with a virus while we were there and she had been scanning her PC over and over trying to clean it out and each time it kept finding more infected files. Anyway the message basically said that the virus had made her bank website go to a different site when she opened it up, and she said without thinking even though she thought it was strange she put in her password when it asked (although banks usually only ask for 3 random characters nowadays, this one asked for her whole password), and she found out on Sunday evening that her bank account had been cleared out of almost £2000... Just goes to show how vigilant you must be, especially when it comes to online banking, but also with downloading things you've got to be so careful of the source, I do wonder exactly how much junk she managed to download with her online games and internet toolbars etc. I hope she's more careful when downloading things, she was in such a state, understandably :(

Anyway. I'm still feeling fairly well with this pregnancy. I think I must be one of the lucky ones, that my sickness is barely anything to write home about, and I really think that one day must have been a bug, or at least the "peak" of my morning sickness as that's the only day I've had anywhere near that bad!

I look at fetal development sites regularly, but what is annoying is that they conflict so much. One says that at 12 weeks the baby is about 5cm long, and another says it's 8cm long.

If the sonographer at the scan can date the pregnancy from how long the fetus is, then surely the figures should be universal?! It is somewhat confusing, but so exciting knowing roughly how big the baby is. I hold up my fingers to roughly the length it says and just think "wow, my baby is that big already!"

Jonathan has jokingly wanted to call the baby Sausage 2 (sigh) or Cletus before we know the sex and come up with names (still no names decided for baby - Jonathan is being particularly slow and just not looking at any, and since he doesn't like any of mine it's up to him to pull his finger out of his arse!!), both of which.. no thank you lol! Sausage 2 just sounds stupid. Cletus (the fetus) sounds silly too. But as I was brushing my teeth last night I was thinking about Robert and how gorgeous he'd been that day, and how I just loved to squidge him.. and I thought "hmmmm Squidge" and I dunno, I like it :) My little Squidge! When it's born, I can give my little Squidge a big squidge! lol!

Friday, 19 March 2010

11 weeks 1 day - graphic for grandparents!

I did one for both sets, my dad's one is below, my mum's one says "Nanna and Grandad" but are identical otherwise.



They are printed and framed and waiting to be wrapped. Today we are going to possibly go to playgroup, then we are packing for the weekend. I'm so excited to see their faces when they open their presents! :)

That's about it right now :) Thank you for your comments on the picture! I now have 5 long weeks to wait til I see the midwife. Argh! I need to get a new maternity exemption form as well as the one I have (and haven;t posted off yet) says 30th September. I'm guessing I'm not allowed to write over the date and change it before I send it off? lol.

Or shall I just send off the one I have and grab a new one from the midwife at 16 weeks?

Monday, 8 March 2010

9 weeks 5 days - told Jonathan's parents

Well, we decided to tell Jonathan's parents this weekend rather than next weekend, so we could give them a bit more notice for babysitting. I guess I'm not too brilliant at keeping the secret as I thought... MIL opened the card and said "Oh!" in a knowing way, and passed it to FIL who repeated her "Oh!" and then they proceeded to tell me they suspected due to my tiredness, suspicious doctor's appointment, smell aversions and my sickness on Tuesday (which I think must have actually been a bug as that's all it amounted to, plus I had the runs in the morning along with feeling sick). Doh! But they were very pleased, and like the midwife, the first question MIL asked was whether I was going to have another home birth! I really don't know just yet.

They're going to do their best to sort out something for Robert on that Thursday, he might have to be minded by someone else for an hour or so. But it's very exciting, only 10 days to go until my scan!

I can't believe how fast this pregnancy is going so far. The first trimester is the worst in many ways because you just don't know what's going on, or if all will be ok, and for that reason it can drag, but with Robert around, it's whizzing past, it really is! I am almost 10 weeks pregnant - a quarter of the way through my pregnancy! It feels like only a week ago I got my BFP. And I guess telling the in-laws this weekend just gone sort of makes it feel like it's the beginning again, we told them last time when I was only about 5 weeks gone, but I'm now almost 10 weeks. I can't wait for my scan! Unfortunately Sarah didn't get very good scan pictures, but I'm hoping that I will get good ones like I did with Robert, so I can nub spot! I couldn't even see a nub on Sarah's it was so blurry! :( But more than that I of course hope that baby is growing well, and is healthy and happy. My worst fear would be seeing a fetus that is only 7 or 8 weeks, because I know my baby should be 11 weeks by my scan. What's worse than a miscarriage is a missed miscarriage, where you're led to believe all is ok only to find out your baby has died, then having to have the baby removed... :( It's so so worrying, all I can do is have faith so I hate this part! And then of course it's 4-5 weeks before I get my next midwife appointment and hear the heartbeat! From 16 weeks it's ok as you hear the heartbeat, and by 15 weeks I was feeling movements. Roll on the next 6-7 weeks!

Thursday, 4 March 2010

9 weeks 1 day - Routine

I really really want to get into a routine for the last few months before baby is here. (I know any routine we have will go out of the window then!!!) But I want this routine to include as little TV as possible, me spending at LEAST 2 hours playing 1-1 with Robert (I feel awful knowing that at the moment this is not happening!) where he has my full attention. I also want it to include washing up EVERY morning after breakfast, and later in the day, a load of washing or some other kind of housework. Oh, and some exercise, and in addition, a walk EVERY day outside, even if it's only for 10 minutes.

I've written up a rough plan, which I might tweak, and of course is flexible for naps etc.

Morning:

- Get up, change Robert's nappy, eat breakfast.
- Wash up after breakfast.
- Put a load of washing on if needed.
- Play with Robert for 45 minutes.
- Go out for a walk.
- hang up washing.

Lunchtime:

- Get lunch ready and eat.
- Settle Robert for his nap.
- 30 minutes exercise during his nap if not tired.
- Hang washing after he wakes if no time before lunch.
- Go to sure start if possible. (If not, maybe have a walk)
- Play with Robert for 45 minutes.
- Cook dinner.

After dinner:

- Play with Robert for 30 minutes.
- Run Robert's bath.
- Start Bedtime Routine.

I really want to get started on this tomorrow, I've not quite stuck to it today although I have done some of it. Jonathan suggested I get points if I stick to it and points earn me prizes from a prize list lol! We shall see!

Anyway, another thing I've done today is that I've been designing a Cbeebies birthday card for Robert. I wanted to do one for him last year, but never got around to even thinking about it til it was too late! I know it's 8 months til his birthday but this will give me time to think about what exactly I want to do, then make it, and hopefully give me several months to spare before October, when I (as well as giving birth LOL) add a recent photo to it (and add little sibling details!) and post it off. :)

Right! Well I'm thinking of going for a walk. One other thing I wanted to say was that we have decided that we need to tell Jonathan's parents about this pregnancy earlier than we wanted to :( We have decided there's really no other way to ask them to babysit than to tell them about it beforehand, as it's on a Thursday.. Thursday is the only day that is quite tricky for them, as my MIL has Country Market that day. I'm hoping it will be ok for FIL to look after him for the majority of the time. But anyway, we're going to tell them on Mother's day (14th March), by writing in a card for MIL and signing it from Robert and Baby Bump :) Hehe! And we are then seeing my parents the weekend after, in Kent. When I will have had my scan, and can therefore frame and present as planned :)

Anyway, I've got to go! *hugs* and *kisses* to you all! (if anyone's still there!! lol)

Thursday, 25 February 2010

8 weeks 1 day - midwife appointment

Well, I had my midwife appointment a couple of days ago. It went really well. :) I know it's only my first one, but blood pressure was "very good" at 110/55, wee was clear, and we had quite a long chat about bits and bobs. She asked me straight out "what are you going to do with this one?" which got me wondering what she meant, but she elaborated, was I going to have another home birth this time. And while I've not made my mind up 100% I am thinking yes, but it won't be another water birth. She said to me (after I asked her for her opinion) that they would recommend a hospital birth after the way Robert's home birth went, but they would honour my wishes. And I said that with the benefit of hindsight, I think this birth would go better than Robert's, as I wouldn't give birth on my back (or reclined as I was), I would give birth squatting, and not in water.

But she went through all the normal forms, asked me about my periods, at which point I *ahem* fibbed a little, and gave my LMP as a couple of days before it actually was, and said that I didn't know how long my cycles were because *ahem* that was my first and only period since Robert was born. She dated me as 30th September due date but I know it's actually 5-7th October. I then found out in the evening when Sarah came around that she has her scan at 12 weeks not 14 like she said before... so I'll probably have mine at 11 weeks! LOL! Ah well! And then have to wait another 5 weeks after for my midwife appointment. But it'll mean we can see baby sooner, and tell the parents sooner :) So I'm looking forward to getting the mail with my scan date. :)

She also took my booking bloods then and there, which was great because it meant I didn't have to go back another day. She was pleased when I told her that I was A positive blood type "Ah good, a nice common one" lol ;)

Although I keep spotting (I had some the morning of my appointment) I have a good feeling about the pregnancy. I just know it's going to go ok. But then I think you do have to tell yourself that anyway. At least in the beginning weeks. I think the first 16 weeks, until you hear the heartbeat for the first time, are a constant worry. Until you start feeling baby move, you just have to have faith all is ok. Even when you get the scan and all is ok then, you do just worry that the next time you have a checkup they won't find the heartbeat.

With regards to my scan, I have decided not to have the nuchal test. I had it with Robert, and got my results in the post. Low risk. It was then that I realised, ok, what does that actually mean? Nothing! I might be that 1 in 1000 or whatever that has the baby with downs. It's still possible, just not probable. So this time I have decided against it. I would not terminate a downs baby. I saw the beginning of a youtube video (it was linked on the side of a 4d scan video) an anti-abortion video, and OMG I immediately regretted clicking on it. How anyone could do that to a baby, THEIR baby.. the pain the poor thing must feel. I don't know if there are more humane ways of doing it but still... it almost made me sick. But anyway, I digress. I saw no point of the nuchal test, so it will simply be a dating scan. Some people have said that some hospitals do it so that if it comes back under 12 weeks they give you another in a couple of weeks time to check the growth. I don't know if Kettering does that, but we shall see.

I'll be expecting my scan date through about a week after my midwife appointment, so maybe around next tuesday. By the time my scan date comes through I could be only 2 weeks away from having a scan! :D And I most likely will get one before Easter now, so once we get the date through we can organise things with the family :) And go and get 3 frames ready ;) I'm so excited. I can't wait to see our parents' faces! I talked for quite a long time on MSN to my mum last night, and somehow I managed to not tell her, but also not tell her about Sarah's pregnancy. If I told her that Sarah was pregnant, she'd start questioning me about how I felt about it, and if I was, or whatever, so I just didn't tell her at all :) Although part of me is wondering if Jonathan's parents are beginning to suspect, what with my doctors appointment and the fact it took an hour from when I left to when I got back (I did say I was waiting a long time lol) and my extreme tiredness, and I have been wondering if I have been talking about Sarah's pregnancy too much, or Robert's. And when the scan DOES come through, I asked the midwife if they allowed children in there, and she said they don't... so we're going to have to come up with a pretty good excuse as to why they'll babysit at a pretty weird time (in the middle of the week, possibly middle of the morning or afternoon). Any ideas??? lol! The only thing I can think of is that Jonathan tells his parents he's booked the day off and that he's taking me out as a surprise or something! And hope it doesn't fall on a Thursday as they're generally unable to help on a Thursday. Or.... Jonathan could take Robert over there in the morning, saying I'm tired, pretend he's going off to work, but come back and pick me up (or hide me in the car while he takes Robert in) and then we head off to Kettering for the scan, then go back home and Jonathan goes off to work in the afternoon, and his parents bring back Robert in the afternoon. Hmmm that could work if it's a morning appointment! If it's an afternoon appointment we might have to think again!

Tuesday, 16 February 2010

6 weeks 6 days - ah it's about time!

I think I am beginning to get morning sickness in a mild form. I am feeling more gaggy, but not really truly feeling like I am about to be sick. I am almost 7 weeks pregnant. On Thursday I will have known for three whole weeks. And that seems crazy! That I will have known for more than half the time I've been pregnant. Little things eh!

Even more amazing is that while *ahem* most of the online communities I am part of know, our families do not. I am still holding onto the thought of them opening up a framed scan picture of our newest little baby and the looks on their faces when they see it, especially those of our parents who don't know we've been trying. My mum knows we've been trying, but she doesn't know as of yet that we've succeeded in conceiving :) In fact the last time we saw her I had infact just begun my last period! And as for my brother finding out, well I think asking him to buy some new nappies for us from costco will work... not for Robert though, I think size 1 nappies will be needed ;)

I have my midwife appointment next Tuesday. One week from today! I can't believe it, I am eager to get the ball rolling, and hopefully get my scan date through the post for sometime towards the end of March. I'm hoping it won't be much later than that though! Please keep your fingers crossed for a March scan date for me!

Today I also (finally!) saw Sarah, my friend who is 4 weeks ahead of me for the first time since we became pregnant. She's about 10 and a half weeks and has her scan in about 3 and a half weeks time. She will be 14 weeks then, and isn't impressed as her scan for Keiran was at 9 weeks lol! But she seems well in herself too, same as me not a lot of sickness per se, but some food aversions. We had a good old natter, the boys played beautifully, and we're going to see each other again tomorrow :) She's bringing along a DVD about babies in utero which looks kinda cool :)

She has names for the baby already, and she's leaning towards boy.. me, I still have no vibes. Nada. :( We have a girl's name (but I'm not 100% sure on it) but no boy's name. And I know for a fact that some of the boy's names I like Jonathan will say no to!

I would really like a sort of unusual name... not one that's just plain stupid, ie, one that's unusual for a reason, but I mentioned while I was pregnant with Robert about Kerryn for a girl, and I really am liking that name. Sort of like Kerry sort of like Karen. And although not quite as unusual, but I like Brendan for a boy, but Jonathan has already strongly vetoed that one :( Sarah's girl name choice is a little unusual, here at least. Well ok, very unusual! But apparently it's quite popular in Ireland. Chloda. I first thought "ehhhhh... ok..." when I heard it, but it's growing on me a bit lol!

Right well I've not had tea yet, and Jonathan is working late most of the week. I bought some sirloin steaks at tesco today, I hope he'll be home for tea soon this week, they're calling out to me ;)

Sunday, 29 November 2009

More TTC thoughts, and more photos

It's amazing how much when you are TTC that you pay attention to what is going on "down there". Last month I had a 33 day cycle. Before Robert I was pretty much bang on 28 days. Anyway, so assuming 33 day cycle is regular, I should, according to the textbooks, be ovulating around cycle day 19. I am currently on cycle day 12, and today (more like late afternoon and evening) I have had two separate instances of egg-white consistency CM with a reddish tinge. Which suddenly got me thinking maybe it's ovulation... and then having thought that I have had the odd right-hand sided pains... But goodness knows if I am imagining it or not! Or if maybe the tinted CM is due to intercourse last night. I am wondering whether to go for it tonight as well or if yesterday's swimmers will be enough in case I AM ovulating? LOL.

Every cycle I keep thinking "If I do get pregnant this month, I'll be due on xyz". This month I thought it would be 30th August if I do get pregnant, but now I'm thinking if I am ovulating now it'll be more like 23rd-25th August. But I do keep getting ahead of myself! I did at one point think I'd be having a July 2nd baby, then a July 24th baby... so there's no point deliberating really, but I can't help myself lol.

But if I do get pregnant..... then when I give birth will make a lot of difference to my baby, between being the youngest in the year above at school or the oldest in the year below... And whether my babies will be 1 or 2 years apart in school.

Anyway, here's a few photos of Robert. :)

The boy LOVES his drinks... He will always guzzle a drink down like crazy, even if he's not thirsty. At which point he will suck loads into his mouth and then spit it out!!!



Having fun in a ball tent. MUST fix the inflatable one the cat burst over summer....


One of me with my cheeky chappy :)


Daddy is out of frame in this one, he's running towards Robert while Jonathan's dad is pushing Robert in his trike... Robert finds this hilarious! And you can also see Robert's 7th tooth (FINALLY!!!!) in this pic!



We took him to messy play again this week. I tend not to go much anymore simply because I get messier than he does, and then I have to try and get paint/sand/shaving foam/dried on porridge oats/whatever off him, get him dry, change him, and argh, it's such a chore!! Less so I guess than actually having to clean up the room as well as him, but still. It's easier when there's an extra pair of hands to help!

There was a table with paint squirted round in patterns for the children to mix up with their hands. Robert saw this table (he was the first to it) and went up, and delicately put a finger or two in the paint and dragged it downwards onto the clean paper. It was fascinating watching him figure out what this stuff was and what it did, and felt like.



But it wasn't long before he got properly stuck in!!




Of course if they ever put anything edible out, Robert will find it. It didn't take him long to find the bowl of porridge oats, or the tray of assorted cereal (cornflakes, shreddies, rice crispies, coco pops)...





How I love that last pic, a true "oh damn, I've been caught out!" expression!!

Here's a photo I love as well, it's of Robert playing in the sand (which he usually just tries to eat). Wonderful photo.


Anyway in other news, we all went northwards this weekend to see my brother, sister-in-law and nephew. It was Ewan's 2nd birthday yesterday, and he has certainly developed into his own little character, one that definitely does NOT like Robert sharing his toys lol! Which fair enough I could understand, he is only two years old. But what did make me quite sad was that Ewan spent pretty much the entire time pushing Robert down. :( He did it over and over and over again. Although he did give Robert some cuddles and kisses too, it was still quite upsetting to see Ewan objecting to Robert's presence like that. I hope that it's just a one off but I guess time will tell. Apart from that it was a lovely weekend, and there were times when Ewan didn't seem to mind Robert being there. Robert spent the entire weekend being interested in what Ewan was doing, eating (of course!) and trying to stroke and pull their cat's fur. Their cat, Kevin is extremely placid, and will actually let Robert near him which is a new experience! For the most part Robert was actually getting better, it's such a shame Hazel doesn't let him near her, as it wouldn't take long for him to understand being gentle with her if she did!

I don't have photos yet but will do hopefully by tomorrow.

Anyway, it's time for bed, I hope I've not bored you too much and that the photos broke up the huge walls of text ;)

Keep your fingers crossed for me that I am ovulating, I might jump on Jonathan later just to make sure there's plenty of swimmers there incase I am ;)