I tested yesterday afternoon with a Tesco test, which didn't come up straight away but after about half an hour to an hour I went back and there was a line. A definite, visible line. Surely a line (a red line) wouldn't appear unless I was pregnant? Even though it says to disregard any results after 10 minutes. Anyway that's why I didn't post. My spotting had trailed off to practically nothing by yesterday too. This morning however, the day before my period is due, it is back and heavier than its been, and dark red.
Last night I lay in bed touching my pubic bone, which, underneath I was sure was a new tiny baby, and I imagined him growing and growing and then finally meeting him. Falling in love with him as I did with Christopher. And now I can't help but feel like its about to be snatched away from me.
Jonathan said to me this morning when I told him "ah well, you didn't really want a December baby anyway did you?" Well, my head didn't, but my heart did, and if I lose this baby, my heart just might break.
Oh love! :( So sorry that things don't look good, and my heart really goes out to you because I know exactly what you're talking about so well. I have had 8 chemical pregnancies that ended this early, and so many times I have laid my hand on my pubic bone and fallen in love - you just can't help it, can you? It doesn't make it better, but the baby that followed the next cycle or so always made up for it, and hopefully you will have the same joy soon! On the other hand, it's not over until the fat lady sings (as they say!), and Elijah completely threw me for a loop with heavier red bleeding lasting longer than a period, so that I had no idea I was pregnant until the "period" had gone on suspiciously long and I finally took a test! Still hoping for you. I came straight to the computer to check on you because I have been dreaming about you testing all night long! Hang in there today... xxx
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